Hilltowns Senior News for Friday, February 17, 2017
“Oh, hello. Just a trim, please. Yes, I know that Mr. Mark isn’t in today, but that’s OK. I’m sure you’ll do a lovely job.”
By the way, have you noticed that “stylists” are only referred to as “Miss,” “Ms.,” or “Mister” in salons that cater to old ladies? Everybody else has adopted the new “we’re all good friends here” attitude. Honorifics seem to imply some sort of class system, so we don’t use them anymore. Except in the South, of course, where most of the rules are different.
I nearly choked the first time someone referred to me as “Miss Phyllis.” I felt as if I should be holding my lace fan up to my face like my dear friend Scarlett. But back to the present.
“How would I like it? Oh, I don’t know; I think I’d like to look elegant but casual. Perhaps a cross between James Dean and Leona Helmsley. You know, the lady who was so mean and used to own all those hotels, but always looked gorgeous?
“Do I use any ‘product’ on my hair? You mean soap, or that goo that makes it all stand on end? My grandmother had some amazing stuff; it was called Jo-Cur (no pun intended that I’m aware of). It was thick, and slimy, and tinted either green or lavender. When you combed that through before you put in the spoolies, you came out looking like Little Orphan Annie. It took a while to dry, of course.
“If you couldn’t afford to go to the hairdresser (yes, that’s what we used to call them), you lay down on the floor with your head over the heating grate, and dried it that way. The grates could get really hot, and I always worried a bit about the coal dust, but that was what there was, so we used it.
“No, I don’t usually use ‘product.’ I get in the shower, soap up, rinse, and get out. Usually I comb it.”
She now she gets a sort of hopeless, pitying look on her face, as though she knows that, if I keep on going like this, all of my hair will probably fall out anyways.
What I’d really like is one of those dramatic asymmetrical cuts that Vidal Sassoon made so popular. You know, the ones that were up over the ear on one side, and fell straight down to the chin on the other, except you need to have hair like Sophia Loren to carry it off. I have Twiggy’s hair, and Ethel Merman’s body.
And another question: Why are you asking me how to give a haircut? Don’t you already know? Don’t they teach you all about the best styles for round faces, or skimpy hair, or bald spots? Do some people really want a particular style even if it looks lousy on them? (I suppose so, having been downtown a couple of times and seeing what passes for chic.)
“Thank you so much.” Now my hair is all poofy and curled and gorgeous, and I would go somewhere to show it off except that first I have to take a shower to get rid of all those itchy little snippets.
Coming up
Moving right along, in case you want to sue your barber, you can make an appointment to see a lawyer for free at the Knox town hall. There is no charge, and no income questions. Two appointments are available each month for any Hilltowns senior. The service is for civil law matters only: no divorces, custody, or criminal issues. Call Pat Lightbody at 872-9400 to schedule your visit.
Cooperative Extension has free water test kits available. No outside labs or special fussing; you can do the test at home. The main number at Co-op is 765-3500.
The Hilltown Seniors are sponsoring a trip to the Culinary Institute of America and the Vanderbilt Mansion on April 5. The cost is $50 for members, and $70 for non-members. The trip includes a lunch of antipasto, Italian roasted chicken (Petto di Pollo Alla Salvia), glazed carrots, chocolate lava cake (Tortino di Cioccolato), and coffee or tea at the renowned Caterina de' Medici restaurant. Shirley Slingerland is taking reservations at 797-3467.
The Hilltown Seniors next meeting will be March 11 at the Berne Reformed Church on Helderberg Trail. Lunch will be corned beef and cabbage, at a subsidized cost of $5 per person. Call Shirley at 797-3467 to register.
March 9 the Helderberg Senior Services will be taking off for the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown. The only charge is admission to the museum, for $13.50 per person. We will stop for lunch, which you can purchase on you own if you choose, or brown bag it from home.
Hilltowns Community Resource Center has lovely lunches at noon every second and fourth Thursday of the month. There is no charge; only your free-will offering. Lunch is followed by an hour of Bingo. The next lunches will be on Feb. 23 (ham and scalloped potatoes!), and March 9. The Resource Center is located at the Reformed Church at 566 Route 143 in downtown Westerlo. Call Mary Beth at 797-5256 fro more info. They also have a food pantry on site; donate or take what you need.
Pastor Wendy Cook reminds us that the next pancake breakfast will begin at 7:30 a.m. on Saturday, Feb. 25 at the Evangelical Lutheran Church on Helderberg Trail in Berne. No set cost; give what you can offer.
The senior shopping bus will make its next trips to Walmart and Whole Foods on Feb. 22 and March 8. Call CDTA at 437-5161 two days in advance to arrange for pickup.
February is American Heart Month, and National Therapeutic Recreation Month . The week of the 19th - 25th is Brotherhood / Sisterhood Week, National FFA Week, and National Invasive Species Awareness Week. Chocolate Mint Day and Introduce A Girl to Engineering Day are the 19th. Iwo Jima Landing Day is the 19th, and Iwo Jima Flag-raising Day is the 23 rd. Love Your Pet Day is the 20th. Museum Advocacy Day is the 21st, and World Thinking Day and George Washington's Birthday are the 22nd. The 23rd is Diesel Engine Day, and World Bartender Day is the 24th. We end the week with International Sword Swallowers Day on the 25th.
Menu
The menu for next week at the Helderberg senior lunch program is:
— Monday, Feb. 20, closed for President’s Day;
— Tuesday, Feb. 21, baked fish with lemon herb sauce, stewed tomatoes, cranberry juice rice, rye bread, and applesauce cake; and
— Friday, Feb. 24, cheeseburger with Swiss cheese on a wheat hamburger bun, seasoned oven roasted potatoes, Brussel sprouts, and oatmeal cookie and pears.
Doors open at 11 a.m. and lunch is served promptly at noon. We also have transportation to and from lunch. Just tell Linda Hodges when you call with your reservation.
Does your Bacon-lovers’ group, Mohawk basket-makers’ club, or Sanskrit Poetry society need an easy place to meet? Why not meet at the Senior Center? Come have lunch, and then get together with your friends! There’s plenty of space, and the center is open for all of us. We already have games, dominoes, and cards after lunch on Mondays and Tuesdays, so join us.
Please call Linda Hodges 24 hours in advance to 872-0940 to reserve lunch, or email her at: , or sign up when you come in. Tell us how many are coming, your name, and your telephone number. If you’d just like to come and help out, call Linda, send an email to , and put “volunteer” in the subject line. Lunches are provided by Helderberg Senior Services, the Albany County Department of Aging, and Senior Services of Albany. The Town of Berne Community and Senior Services Center is located at 1360 Helderberg Trail (Route 443) in Berne.