On Tuesday, April 12, the Old Men of the Mountain met at the County Café on Main Street in Schoharie.
Here is another weather report from the OFs. Those on the Hill talk about a mighty wind that blew through the area and where hail came down for a brief time so hard that it was at a 10-degree angle to the Earth before it struck the ground.
After the hail came the rain. Then, on the news, the OFs saw the damage done by what was a comparatively local blow. The weather guys never saw that one coming or told the OFs to batten down the hatches.
The OMOTM sat in the comfort of the County Café enjoying the aroma of breakfast being made in the kitchen and looking out the window across the street to the Schoharie County Courthouse where trees are down and the park is gone. Construction is underway to build a hydraulic dike to keep the water from running into the courthouse when there is another flood.
The OFs say what a shame to spend all that money and ruin all that real estate when the OFs feel it would be less expensive just to add another floor to the courthouse if they need the space; subsequently abandon the basement and first floor.
But nobody asked the OFs. Some of the OGs can just fall out of bed and be at the County Café so it is not like the OFs are outsiders butting in.
The OFs discussed the location of the county jail and that is another bone of contention where (in the opinion of the OFs) the opinions of the residents were ignored.
This led to other topics that are generally no-no’s at the table: Politics and religion. That is the general heading of the conversation but it wasn’t explicitly on religion or politics.
Is God having trouble finding people to call?
Discussion was how the attendance in many organized faiths is dropping off, and churches are combining services in one church and closing others.
In some faiths, according to the OFs, it is a combination of the lack of attendance, and fewer young people showing interest and this trend is causing a shortage of young people going into the ministry.
This made one OF think, if it is God that calls people to the ministry, is God having trouble finding people to call, or is he calling them to minister in the church of “What’s Happening Now?” Or is it that the traditional churches are so wrapped up in adhering to tradition that they are failing to minister?
Lacking presidential material
And, as for politics, the OFs at this scribe’s end of the table had no idea who they are going to vote for. The OFs felt none of those running to be the nominee of their parties were presidential material.
One OF said that, no matter which party took the White House, the OFs could look for, “A crow in every pot, and bicycle in every garage.”
None of the OFs could remember such a circus as there is now for an upcoming presidential election. It was more or less a generic opinion for the OFs that, with all the name calling and mudslinging going on among all of those running, how could anyone trust any of them?
The scariest words to hear is someone who says, “Trust me.”
One OF wondered who would want to run for president — their lust for power has to be great and their hide has to be as thick as a tank so that they can deal with the press, and all the negativity that is thrown about.
Oh, well. None of the OFs are running for office anyway so it is all moot. Then again, maybe the OFs should run as a group and maybe something would get done.
The OFs thought that, if enough people wrote in “Mickey Mouse,” maybe Disney could run the government and the whole country could then live in fantasyland.
Bionic men share trials and tribulations
The OFs continue to become more bionic. One OF is going in for knee replacement; another is going for facial repair.
It is interesting to see how fast the medical profession is progressing in replacing people parts — not only organs, but joints too.
One OF had shoulder work done maybe 10 or more years ago; lately, one of this OF’s shoulder started acting up. The OF went to the same doctor who performed the procedure originally and, when the doctor saw the OF and the X-rays, he told the OF, “Oh, I don’t do it that way anymore — I don’t cut, or use screws like that. I use lasers.”
He didn’t offer any condolences to the OF either. In fact, the doctor said, “You’re too old, suck it up; I will give you a shot.”
The OF said at the breakfast “Well, that shot lasted about three weeks.”
The OF going in for the knee operation might have the procedure performed with current technology, and the ways of yore may be long gone for how it is done now. The OFs wonder, at the rate medicine and technology is progressing, what medical procedures will be like in 50 years from now to replace a hip or transplant a heart.
OFs in office
The OFs who made it to the Country Café in Schoharie, and who think it might be a good idea to write in OFs for president, were: Miner Stevens president; Glenn Paterson, vice president; Mark Traver, secretary of State; Chuck Aelesio, Federal Bureau of Investigation director; Mark Traver, secretary of Defense; Harold Guest, press secretary; John Rossmann, secretary of the Navy; Roger Chapman, secretary of Homeland Defense; Bill Lichliter, secretary of Treasury; George Washburn, Federal Aviation Administration director; Robie Osterman, secretary of Transportation; Lou Schenck, secretary of Communication; Jack Norray, secretary of Interior; Gerry Irwin, secretary of the Environmental Protection Agency; Matt Farnam, United Nations ambassador; Ted Willsey, secretary of Labor; Mike Willsey, secretary of Housing and Urban Development; Bob Fink, secretary of Education; Bob Benninger, secretary of Energy; Jim Rissacher, secretary of Health and Human Resources; Elwood Vanderbilt, secretary of Farm and Home Management; Gerry Chartier, chief of staff; Harold Grippen, secretary of Veterans Affairs; and me, chief dog catcher.
Location:
Tuesday, April 5, was a tad unusual. The Old Men of the Mountain headed off to Mrs. K’s Restaurant in Middleburgh and it was cold.
Some car loads of OFs reported temperatures as low as 10 below in Gallupville, and 7 below in Schoharie. All the car loads of OFs spoke about the scenery along the flats of Fox and Schoharie creeks as being in a Disney movie.
The trees glistened white covered in either frozen fog, or hoar frost. There were stretches of thick fog as the OFs approached Middleburgh where the creek and the highway are close together.
The fog rolled along the ground but most of the time the OFs were able to see over this blanket of white and, out of the blanket, the white trees and shrubs rose from the fog. Unusual to see and drive through, it was a very short scene — sleeper-inners missed all this.
Throw-away society
The OFs talked about how we are continuing to be a throw-away society, at least in this country, and maybe worldwide. The OFs talked about tools and appliances that they used to have fixed and then continued to use.
Today, many items, if they fail, or won’t work, the stores do not try to fix them. They just grab a new one from the shelf and take the old one and send the OF on his way.
There used to be mom-and-pop repair shops all over. If the TV didn’t work, the repairman would come to your home with his toolbox and truck full of parts and fix the broken item. Now there is no fix to it; whatever it is, it is scrapped and the OF gets a new one, or a discount on a new one.
The OFs remember going to the store called Lake Electronics in Albany that had parts to fix just about any appliance. If the OF knew how to use a screwdriver, a pair of pliers, and a soldering iron, he could fix just about any appliance with parts from Lake Electronics
You could also go to Wards or Sears and get parts to fix most appliances, lawn mowers, weed whackers — you name it.
Even a little further back, when the OFs purchased a car or truck or tractor, a set of tools came with it, so the OFs or anyone else for the matter, could fix it. Some cars, trucks, tractors, equipment, and appliances gave the option to purchase spare parts that were just part of preventative maintenance.
The manual that came with the appliance would also include a maintenance schedule that would advise when these parts should be installed. One OF said that even these days some of the small, cheap models of cars are throw-away vehicles. It’s less expensive to buy a new one than have the old vehicle repaired.
Whatever happened to the no-call list?
The OFs were wondering if the no-call list is still active. The OFs were complaining about the frequency of robo-calls that seem to be interrupting their day.
Many heads nodded in agreement as this subject came up. The OFs said that some are receiving as many as 10 a day.
This scribe thinks that 10 a day is a throw-out number because he did not know of any OF who puts a tick on the wall each time the phone rings and one of these calls come in. However, even the scribe has noticed an increase in these types of calls and the scribe is supposed to be on the no-call list as well.
Politicians were sneaky enough to eliminate their calls from the no-call list. Almost all of the OFs claim that one way for a politician to lose a vote is to call many of the OFs.
An OF said he could have his head and half his body under the sink fixing a faucet when the phone rings. The OFs said he may be expecting a call from someone to help, so then he unwinds himself from under the sink and answers the phone.
It is a political call from some young supporter working the phones. Many of the OFs were in the Navy and that young supporter may hear words they never knew existed.
Too old for the chase?
As the OFs get older, their minds tend to become younger and they think they are 40-something. Some purchase new boats with 150-horsepower engines; others purchase a Mazda Miata; and one OF (who should know better) just purchased a new, or almost new, Trike (three-wheeler) motorcycle.
The next thing you know, some of the OFs will be chasing younger women. These OFs won’t catch them though, even if the young damsels are running away in spiked high heels, because the canes of the OFs will get in their way and trip the OGs up.
Hot topics
The conversations at last Tuesday’s breakfast covered a number of hot-topic items: the gun law, the $15-an-hour wage, paid leave, and the five-dollar charge on all insurance policies imposed by the state to pay police for issuing tickets.
Last year, the insurance companies on the OFs’ behalf paid into this fund $125 million so the police can issue their tickets. The OFs’ opinion is: We are paying for our own tickets
One OF said, “Well, if we weren’t breaking the law we would not get a ticket; we would just be out 5 or 10 bucks — or maybe a little more.”
Condolences
We must mention the passing of two of the OMOTM and offer our condolences to both families. The older members of the OMOTM will remember Stephen Torok, and Howard “Skip” Skinner who both passed away the week of April 3.
Those OFs who made it to Mrs. K’s restaurant in Middleburgh and, as the old saying goes, if the OF catches what the OF is chasing, he wouldn’t know what to do with her, were: George Washburn, Robie Osterman, Bill Lichliter, Roger Chapman, John Rossmann, Harold Guest, Glenn Patterson, Chuck Aelesio, Mark Traver, Mace Porter, Lou Schenck, Gerry Irwin, Ed Traeger, Bob Fink, Bob Benninger, Gerry Chartier, Elwood Vanderbilt, Mike Willsey, Ted Willsey, Jim Rissacher, Harold Grippen, and me.
Location:
The Old Men of the Mountain met at the Middleburgh Diner in the village of Middleburgh on March 29. It doesn’t seem like it’s been 16 years since the world was supposed to come to an end, all the computers were supposed to crash, and the second coming was supposed to occur.
The OFs’ first discussions were about the winds during the early morning hours of March 29. For our area, it was a blow. For all the howling of the wind, the OFs did not notice many trees down. There were some smaller branches and a few larger dead limbs or small dead trees down but nothing to write home about.
If any of the OFs have had the experience of being in a hurricane, no OF in the hearing range of this scribe mentioned it. What an experience it must be with winds double the speed of the night we had on March 29.
What happened to March going out like a lamb? Maybe the timing isn’t generic. The timing is definitely March 1, and the 31, so the 31 may yet be tranquil and warm so the ole saw will fit.
The OFs did mention being on cruises in high seas, and both of the OFs telling tales of what went on was like the OFs were on the same cruise at the same time. However, the times were different and the departure cities were different.
One left from New Jersey, and the other from Fort Lauderdale. The similarities were uncanny. One OF said that the ship was shuddering from the pounding of the waves that were hitting the ship as high up as the sixth deck. This OF said that after the storm abated the ship continued on and completed the cruise.
The other OF said that on his ship the waves were washing all the furniture that was on the decks off the fantail, and letting the sharks have the tables, chairs, umbrellas, and all that stuff for their next picnic. This OF said that there was a water spout off the port side of the ship that sent out two huge rolling waves
The ship went up on the first one and started back up as the next wave hit the ship and sent it back down. The OF was not familiar with the group of people he was standing with but all of their knees buckled and all of them went to the deck.
The casino was closed, the deck doors were locked; it was quite a ride. The engines were disabled, and the mechanics managed to repair one and eventually they limped into the Bahamas, turned around, and went back to Fort Lauderdale with one engine. The OF said that on the return trip the ocean was as flat as a table top — not a ripple in it.
These types of adventures the OFs can relate to. Certain events the OFs use to date other events, like using the phrase “Oh, that was right after the cruise we took to Timbuktu,” or something like that.
The description of “barf bags” everywhere, hanging on the railings and over the backs of chairs is why both OFs thought they were on the same boat. One of the OFs said they thought “The Poseidon Adventure” was not that far fetched.
The natural segue was travel by air and some of the experiences the OFs had on that means of travel. This scribe noticed that all the stories (both boat and plane) were of when things went awry. The tendency to keep in mind all the traveling, where on the trip everything went well, the OFs did not remember much.
Bugged by bugs
A common conversation among the OFs is their current health condition. These are not pity parties just stating the facts of life for the over-75 crowd. These conversations are generally quite short.
At the breakfast Tuesday morning, it was found that many of the OFs have been battling this cold/flu/allergy bug that is going around. The OFs found that apparently this is not a local bug.
In talking to relatives up and down the East Coast, many have the same problems. What makes this interesting is one OF’s description of it. It is rare for this particular OF to not be present at a breakfast and he did miss one.
This past Tuesday morning, he said he had the “two-pail flu” and is still weak from it. For those who have had or are in the process of going through it, it is not over in a week or so.
The OFs who have had it probably still have vestiges of the nasty bug, because this bug hangs on for weeks and weeks until it can find another home. Some OFs think the bugger comes back. (When did bugs come to be associated with colds, flu, and a variety of other ailments?)
The mysterious “S”
The OFs mentioned Warner Lake this past Tuesday and wondered where the “S” comes from on some of the spellings of the lake. There is no “S” on Warner Lake, just like there is no “S” on Wal-Mart.
Many people will say “I’m going to Wal-Marts, which is wrong. Well, this is the end of this week’s report from “The Old Men of the Mountain” — not Mountains.
The Old Men of the Mountain made it to the Middleburgh Diner, where the waitress made an announcement that a waitress from another restaurant wanted to say “Hi” to the OFs. The OFs who were at the Middleburgh Diner said “Hi” back and the OFs are glad we make a favorable impression, and those OFs were: John Rossmann, George Washburn, Robie Osterman, Bill Lichliter, Harold Guest, Dave Williams, Mark Traver, Glenn Patterson, Chuck Aelesio, Don Wood, Roger Chapman, Marty Herzog, Miner Stevens, Lou Schenck, Gerry Irwin, Jack Norray, Wayne Gaul, Jim Rissacher, Bob Fink, Bob Benninger, Mike Willsey, Elwood Vanderbilt, Ed Traeger, Jeff Ward, Dave Porter, Gary Chartier, Harold Grippen, and me. It was good to see Gary Porter at the table this morning.
Location:
On Tuesday, March 22, the Old Men of the Mountain met at Kim’s West Winds Diner on Route 145 in Preston Hollow.
This restaurant is a new one for the Old Men of the Mountain, and it was well received. The Old Men of the Mountain’s clock is now beginning to resemble an amoeba.
On a whiteboard in the restaurant was a message that read, “Welcome to the other side of the Mountain — The Old Men of the Mountain.” That was true because, to many of the OFs, it is the other side of the mountain.
The restaurant, new to the OFs, has been in Preston Hollow for some time and was recommended by one of the OFs who knew of the place and said it would meet our criteria.
Hiking mentor
Back again to the hiking chatter. One of the OMOTM who is part of a group made up of serious hikers (this is another group within the group of OFs) would hike with Fred Schroeder. This OF said that Mr. Schroeder was his mentor as far as this OF becoming an accomplished hiker.
Fred and Martha Schroeder are the ones that donated the money to build the nature center on Ketchum Road in the town of Knox. The Schroders donated it in the name of Emma Treadwell Thacher for all the work she did in donating land that would eventually became John Boyd Thacher Park, one of New York State’s jewels hidden in the Helderbergs.
Tough sledding
Some of the OFs run their ATVs and snowmobiles like many other people who use these pieces of equipment as a hobby and for recreation. This year, it was necessary to travel quite a distance to find any snow to use these expensive toys, and equally expensive gear, other than planters in the yard for holiday decorations.
They would take the time to travel north to Old Forge or the Tug Hill Plateau or Tupper Lake to find snow. They do not have snow guns on snowmobile trails like they do ski areas.
Keeping pace
Electronics are developing faster than the OFs can keep up. One OF said he watches his grandkids only 3 years old play computer games.
Say what!
Many of the OFs were just learning to talk at 3 years old.
One OF mentioned the newer cars, and how, on a smartphone with the right electronics in a car, he saw a car that was in a Texas airport parking lot. The owner of the car was standing next to him on the mountain in New York State, and he had the phone tell him everything that was going on with that car, in real time, and that car was 2,000 miles away.
The phone recorded where the car was, what parking spot it was in, that the doors were locked, the mileage had not changed, the amount of oil in the car, etc., etc. The OF said that the car could even be started from here on the mountain. One OF said this is getting creepy.
There are negatives and positives to this type of technology. Again, on the positive side, another OF related a story of a friend of his who purchased a car where this type of technology was free for six months and then, if you wanted to keep it, there was a monthly charge.
His friend said “no” to continuation. His friend’s car was stolen after the grace period. The friend went to the police to report the stolen vehicle.
The police were able to access the information from the car, located where the car was, and in short time located the vehicle, and made an arrest. That is a plus in one way, but a negative in another; with that information, now anyone will be able to tap into that “extra” on the car and locate where you are.
So any time an OF stays out late, the wife can have the grandson take his smartphone and find where he is. Then they get in the grandson’s car and find the OF is at Sleazy Joe’s Girly Joint and Bar. Now that OF is in trouble!
And now one OF said hackers are hacking into the automobiles as they are driving and steering and applying the brakes and the driver cannot control the vehicle. That, too, is scary.
As the OFs have said, just give me a regular engine, standard transmission, a rear end, four wheels, and brakes, and the OFs will do the rest
One OF said to his friend, “The way you drive, you left off one necessary item, a horn.”
What’s next?
A few weeks ago, the OFs discussed Teflon, as the newest, best thing for cooking and cleaning up afterward. Now we are hearing about PFOA (perfluorooctanoic acid). In case someone has been living under a rock, the PFOAs, man-made toxic chemicals, have contaminated the water supply in Hoosick Falls and a couple of other places that we know of.
The same difficulty turned up with asbestos. Asbestos used to be the newest, best thing for building materials and who knows what else, and now it is the worst product going.
The OFs are wondering what’s next.
One thing the OFs are doing is reviewing their pots and pans and getting rid of the ones with the old Teflon coating on them. Of course, there is one OF who interjected a little common sense — that is, why worry about it now that we are OFs? We’ve got what (health problems) we have, no changing that.
“The only thing is,” one OF said, “it keeps the grandkids safe by getting rid of this stuff.” That is true — keeping them safe and out of harm’s way is paramount.
Those OFs who traveled to Kim’s West Winds restaurant in Preston Hollow and were pleasantly surprised were: George Washburn, John Rossmann, Roger Chapman, Miner Stevens, Harold Guest, Robie Osterman, Bill Lichliter, Dave Williams, Don Wood, Mark Traver, Glenn Patterson, Chuck Aelesio, Lou Schenck, Jack Norray, Mace Porter, Wayne Gaul, Gerry Irwin, Matt Famin, Bob Fink, Bob Benninger, Elwood Vanderbilt and his grandson Derrick, Mike Willsey, Gerry Chartier, Marty Herzog, Harold Grippen, and me.
Location:
The good weather is still holding for we OFs who currently travel to the furthest restaurant on our schedule to have breakfast. The Hilltown Café in Rensselaerville is a hike for some but right in the backyard for other OFs. On March 15, the spring-like weather was still around.
The OFs used to complain about Route 85 going to Rensselaerville but not any longer. That portion of the highway has been paved so the conditions of all the roads the OFs take to have breakfast at the Hilltown Café are in good shape and, unless there is a big argument going on in the cars, it is a pleasant trip.
Most of the time, as the OFs arrive at the restaurants, each carload sits with the same group they drove there with. On occasion, there isn’t enough room for a particular carload to sit together at a table and that splits one OF out and he enters another group. This makes for interesting conversation because the OF who does not generally sit with that group brings different tales to the tableOFs arrive at the restaurants, each carload sits with the same group they drove there with. On occasion, there isn’t enough room for a particular carload to sit together at a table and that splits one OF out and he enters another group. This makes for interesting conversation because the OF who does not generally sit with that group brings different tales to the table
This is just like square dancing. Four couples will travel to a dance and form their own square for most of the dance. (Except if you danced to caller Ken Downs. He had a few calls that would mix the party up pretty good and that was fun).
A split-up happened this past Tuesday and it was found that, at the table with four unlikely OFs, the conversation was spirited, lively and interesting because all at the table were involved with scouting, outdoor activities, and hiking. The topics covered Boy Scout camps throughout Albany, Schenectady, and Schoharie counties.
One OF is still involved with scouting while the others had to draw on fond memories of when they were in Scouts, and were Scoutmasters. For some of the OFs, that was going back a ways.
The OFs discussed the Boy Scout “freeze outs,” which were overnight camp-outs in the winter. Most of the time it was as tough on the scoutmasters as it was the Scouts.
One OF, a, former scoutmaster, remembered taking a couple of Scouts home in the middle of the night from a freeze-out at Thacher Park. After dropping the Scouts off, this OF was thinking about stopping at his own home while he was so close, because he was freezing, but he resisted the temptation; he dutifully went back to the tent. This OF is still involved with scouting and on the Eagle Scout review board.
One OF mentioned that, while his son was in Scouts (when they had the freeze-outs on Long Island), the campsite was already set up and ready to go. Not so with some of the freeze-outs upstate. Here the Scout had to learn how to set up tents (while there was a foot or more of snow on frozen ground) and how to prepare these tents so they were dry and reasonably comfortable inside in the dead of winter.
Another former scoutmaster remembered becoming snowed in on a freeze-out off Singer Road in the town of Knox. This was a long time ago and cell phones hadn’t been invented yet.
So a scoutmaster had to snowshoe out from the campsite to the Thompson Lake Road to make a phone call and have the town send out plows followed by cars to get the Scouts out. The Scouts had a blast, not so the scoutmasters and adults that were there. (Scribe’s note: As a matter of fact, phones then were still the black rotary phones; that was all there was — even the Princess phone was still a figment of someone’s imagination).
What the OFs learned as Scouts and from being involved in scouting, and what they continued to learn as scoutmasters (along with serious outdoor people who hiked and camped out) was invaluable to their overall adult lives later on. The OFs were remembering years ago but they assumed scouting must still be similar only with more up-to-date equipment today.
Early spring
This year, so far, is nothing like some of those years with the Scouts. The pussy willows have already bloomed, some crocus and snow flowers are popping their colorful heads out of the ground, the cluster flies have decided to wake up and buzz all around the sunny windows, and lawns are being raked.
One-stop shop
The OFs next talked about the Montgomery Ward building on Broadway in Menands. Malls are not that new.
“Monkey-wards” in Menands was a mall. It was a bustling place in the 1930s, ’40s, and ’50s. The OFs could not quite remember when it started to fizzle out.
It was a planned trip from the farm to Wards. The OFs remember going there with their families. Their fathers would purchase items from the floor, and then from the catalog, and the kids would go to the pickup area and wait. It was fun to watch through the doors that went into the warehouse to see the workers hauling items from the shelves.
Wards had a restaurant, snack shop, beauty salon, camping supplies, farm supplies, and clothes. There was everything there except a movie theatre.
It even had medical supplies for people and animals. You could purchase a small tractor, or a canoe. The store even sold windmills, barns, and sheds, and the newest radio or telephone.
Try finding those in one of these new malls. One OF said that all he sees in the new malls are shoe stores, clothing stores, and the occasional jewelry store.
The OFs that made it to the Hilltown Café in Rensselaerville, and would love to see a store like Montgomery Wards come back, were: Robie Osterman, George Washburn, Roger Chapman, Miner Stevens, John Rossmann, Bill Lichliter, Harold Guest, Dave Williams, Karl Remmers, Alvin Latham, Mace Porter, Chuck Aelesio, Otis Lawyer, Glenn Patterson, Mark Traver, Lou Schenck, Jack Norray, Wayne Gaul, Gerry Irwin, Don Wood, Bill Rice, Henry Whipple, Ted Willsey, Mike Willsey, Warren Willsey, Gerry Chartier, Jim Rissacher, Elwood Vanderbilt, Harold Grippen, and me.
Location:
On March 8, the Old Men of the Mountain met at the Home Front Café in Altamont. It was a nice uneventful early morning. The sun was coming up and, though a little chilly, there was a Florida feel to the air
Maybe it is more than global warming; the planet may be tipping on its axis at a greater rate than originally was thought.
The OFs who were (and still are) farmers of sorts are a little concerned about this early warm weather. In their bucket of wishes, they hope for some snow, the wet warm kind, and plenty of it.
These rains aren’t going to mean much because the ground has a lot of frost in it and the rain is just going to run off. Snow, the farmer OFs say, will suck the frost out of the ground and the water from the melting snow will be able to get to the aquifers
They also say that, if a few days of real cold weather should happen to come by now, it will severely damage the early budding of trees and plants that has been brought on by such early warm days and nights.
One OF thought that, if the weather holds true to their bucket wish list, third cuttings of hay will be normal and first cuttings could end sometime in April.
Then one OF said, “Look how long we are going to have to put up with mosquitoes if things become this warm this early.”
“Maybe,” another OF said, “fall may start in June; who knows?”
With the spring-like weather coming sooner than expected, many of the OFs who are collectors of sorts — actually bordering on hoarding — were talking about clearing out some of their clutter. This is only talk, mind you; this is not cast in any kind of stone.
The stone for this rhetoric hasn’t even been found yet and this scribe doesn’t think any of the OFs are even looking for it.
One OF said to another OF that, for him to clear out his clutter, he would need a tractor trailer. The other OF replied that, that OF should talk; it would take two tractor trailer loads just for him to clear off the top of the pile.
“Wait a minute,” the other OF said. “What I have is collectible; it is my wife that has the clutter.
It was strange because the reply from the other OF was in agreement; he said, if he didn’t watch his collection of old tractors and farm machinery and parts, his wife would have the junk dealer come in and haul it away.
That conversation led to how the collectors of large items are going to have these collections for awhile because the bottom has fallen out of the price for scrap. Then another OF (one who is not part of the collector group of OFs) said he just purchased an anvil so he could strap his wife to it and sell her for scrap.
Another OF said, “You are stuck with her for now. Wait until the price goes back up; then you ship her off to the scrapyard.”
Navy vs. Air Force
At the table Tuesday morning, an OF who was in the Navy, and an OF who was in the Air Force sat directly across from one another and these two began talking about which one of them had it tougher in the service
The OF in the Navy described what it was like on a ship that was not much larger than a Saudi’s yacht. His ship had only four toilets, he said, for everyone on board, and these toilets were made of wood
The Air Force OG maintained that they did not have conditions like that. The Air Force had bunks and regular latrines, whereas the Navy OF slept on a hammock that he shared with another fellow
But the Air Force OF said that their attrition rate was much higher than the swabbies. So the debate goes on between the different branches of the military.
Sick bay
Quite often, the OFs discuss other OFs who are ill, or laid up, and at Tuesday morning’s breakfast some mentioned a collection of OFs who are out of commission for one reason or another. The concern for them all was genuine, because many of the OFs can safely say the old phrase, “Been there, done that,” and be right.
The OFs started talking about attitude when one of them is under the weather; how some moan and groan and that allows for some semblance of relief.
Others just grin and bear it; some take the attitude of, “Well, I got it — now what,” and still others become so miserable no one wants to be around them. Some appreciate company because talking takes their mind off whatever it is that is bothering them, and others just want to be left alone. Still others equate visitors like vultures waiting for the OF to pass away, which may or may not happen.
One OG mentioned he does not know what to do. This OF said he does not want the ill OF to feel that everyone has abandoned him, but he doesn’t want to upset him either.
And then there are the Job visitors who belie the OF who lies there in his misery, with the comments of his sorry life, i.e., we told you that your smoking would bring you to this, or how many times did we tell you to lay off the booze.
Then some OFs would tell the OF that they came to visit he was surely going to have to put up with what he has. This OF said his problem was chasing all those women and catching them. The most accurate declaration of all would be, “We told you to slow down, you OF; you are not 50 years old anymore.”
Many of the OFs feel like these OFs at one time or another; still, all the OFs are concerned about the ones who are temporarily not with us and can’t wait until they get back to the breakfast table. Then the returning OF can continue with his story, which is likely to be 20-percent exaggeration, 40-percent fabrication, and the balance might have a smattering of the truth tucked in there someplace.
Those OFs who made it to the Home Front Café in Altamont, and claim, “The weather is what it is; deal with it,” were: Roger Chapman, Karl Remmers, Bill Lichliter, Dave Williams, John Rossmann, Harold Guest, Bill Tinning, George Washburn, Otis Lawyer, Mark Traver, Chuck Aelesio, Glenn Patterson, Ted Willsey, Jim Rissacher, Lou Schenck, Gerry Irwin, Jack Norray, Mace Porter, Wayne Gaul, Mike Willsey, Bill Rice, Henry Whipple, Gerry Chartier, Harold Grippen, and me.
The Old Men of the Mountain gathered together on March first (on the Hill, March roared in like a lion during the night; the wind rattled the windows — welcome March) at the Chuck Wagon Diner in Princetown. The sun was shinning so bright in the morning that the blinds had to be shuttered because of the glare.
The Chuck Wagon is on Route 20, which runs east and west in New York State. The windows on one side of the restaurant face just about due east, and, while enjoying the breakfast at the restaurant early in the morning, the OFs can welcome the sun as it eases its way over the hill.
One OF found that using the microwave to boil sap is not a good idea. The steam generated started to loosen the wallpaper in the kitchen.
The OFs remembered renting steamers, or making steam on their own to do just that — loosen the wallpaper — so it becomes pliable, and then with wide putty knives the OFs could scrape the wallpaper off the wall. Then they would hang new wallpaper.
That was back when wallpaper was popular. Some of the OFs still prefer wallpaper to paint. One OF said with the wallpaper there is still the insulation aspect of the paper on the wall. The OFs that know how to apply wallpaper would rather do that then apply paint.
Eerie talk
How this next topic came up, this scribe does not know, not having caught the beginning. The subject was wax in their ears, which is normal, but a rather curious conversation at breakfast.
However, the OFs continued on by pointing out that they had gotten bugs in their ears. The range covered most flying insects, from the no-see-ums, regular cluster flies, the occasional small moth, and lightening bugs, to the really bad bugger — a hornet. Inside the ears is no place anyone would want to be stung.
Pure water and fresh air
The OFs who live on the Hill said, with all the water problems that seem to cropping up in other areas, they are glad they live up here with the trees and rocks. The Helderbergs do not have much dirt and except for the areas that will support a pond and a few small lakes there is not a lot of water on the Hill to support industry.
One OF mentioned the prevailing winds blow across a lot of open real estate before it reaches the Hilltowns. This, the OFs thought, also allows the Hilltowns to breathe fresh air.
One OF mentioned that the few that want to bring industry to the Hilltown are thinking more of the buck, than of the health of those that live here. As time marches on, the OFs are beginning to see there is a considerable downside to many industries as far as the general health of the public is concerned.
The OFs were in a preachy mood on this subject.
Some of the OFs say they are going to make a change to stainless steel, glass, or cast-iron cookware now, and not use anything covered with Teflon.
Practical advice on planning funerals
It seemed strange that, after this subject was covered, the OFs went on to chat about something else and the topic was funerals. None of the OFs want to experience a funeral from the inside.
One OF mentioned how some funeral directors lead the family to purchase the best caskets. An OF thought this was easy to do because of the state of mind the family is in due to the death of a family member. It was a form of conjecture on how the OFs have their ducks lined up in case the OF’s foot meets the bucket.
One OF thought that, if you know you are going to die, it is a good idea to get the family together and straighten things out so they are not left with a mess when you do enter through the pearly gates.
On the other hand, if your demise is sudden, and the OF is in good health, the family is left with this type of mess unless the OF has taken the time to show someone in the family where the paperwork is, and what kind of funeral the OF wants, and what kind of casket, etc. It seems the OFs have covered this before but this time it seemed to come from a different angle and be a bit more practical.
Good vibrations
The OFs discussed how much technology is now crammed into a little smartphone. They mentioned how clear the tiny little speakers are.
One OF said he can put his phone on speakers, put it in his shirt pocket, and have a conversation. The OF said people can hear him, and he can hear them.
Some of the OFs said that is where they carry their phone but most of the time they can’t hear it when the ringtone is calling them. They also mention that, when the phone is on vibrate, it needs to be close to them or they can’t feel the vibrations
The OFs said that, though the technology is beyond their understanding, the age-old idiom is true: As the OF gets older, his sense of hearing is dimmed, and his sense of feel is beginning to migrate from the body. This may be the reason for their complaints, the OFs can hardly hear Big Ben, or sense the vibration of a concrete leveler.
Antiques experts
Many of the OFs are antiques, and it stands to reason that many watch the “Antiques Roadshow” on PBS. Quite often, the objects some people bring in are what the OFs have hanging around the house or are still using.
One OF suggested someone should bring him in and see how much he is worth as an antique. I’ll give you five bucks was a reply to which another reply was that it was too high.
Those OFs who made it to the Chuck Wagon Diner in Princetown and all still very much alive and ambulatory were: Miner Stevens, Bill Lichliter, George Washburn, Robie Osterman, Roger Chapman, Roger Shafer, Bill Tinning, John Rossmann, Harold Guest, Jack Norray, Mace Porter, Gerry Irwin, Wayne Gaul, Lou Schenck, Glenn Patterson, Mark Traver, Chuck Aelesio, Ted Willsey, Jim Rissacher, Elwood Vanderbilt, Harold Grippen, and me. S
Location:
It looks like one of our biggest concerns is coming true — this is going to be a year where the bad weather will fall on a Tuesday.
On Tuesday, Feb. 16, the Old Men of the Mountain met at the Your Way Café in Schoharie and the roads were not in great shape. One OF thought there was a temperature inversion, because the temperature on the Hill was in the 40s, and the temperature in the valley at 6:45 a.m. was 27 degrees.
The parking lot at the restaurant was solid ice and very slippery. The OFs hung on to each other as they did their Tim Conway shuffle to the restaurant. The plows were out doing their thing, so the OFs were pretty sure that, when they left the Your Way Café, the roads (like the week before) would be in better shape. (Scribe’s note, at least for those in our vehicle, the roads were better.)
Stained-glass reverie
The OFs touched on an unusual topic for them; it was stained-glass windows. The real old-fashioned stained-glass windows cost and arm and a leg, plus maybe a scalp, an ear, and an eye to have cleaned and repaired.
Of course, this is depending on the size of the window. The cost, which may be understandable, is prohibitive in many cases and small churches simply cannot afford to have this done.
What many churches are doing is covering the stained glass window with clear glass, or storm windows, in order to protect the stained-glass window. The way the OFs understand it, the new stained glass windows are regular colored glass, which is generally applied over a pane of regular glass, not like the old-fashioned stained-glass window that was cut and then leaded to separate the colors that were fitted like a jigsaw puzzle.
The OFs thought the old-fashioned way must have been painstakingly slow and meticulous. First, a sketch to fit the opening; then, locating or making the colored glass; then, cutting; and now it is time to make the window.
Red-winged scouts
Two OFs have reported seeing red-winged blackbirds in our area already. One OF saw the birds in Colonie, and another right in the town of Knox. This is a little early for these birds to make a showing.
Those birds may have had a few scouts in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania and reported back that the fury rodent said spring would be early this year. Now they are hauling butt back north to take advantage of the seeds that should be on the ground from last fall.
The OFs know that, when the birds first show up, they attack the backyard feeders by the drove. It is only mid-winter and we could get a ton of snow between now and April, but maybe these birds know something we don’t.
The better half wins out
Most of the OFs who are still married are easy-going types. These OFs acquiesce to their partners on many occasions. More often than not it costs the OF time or money.
One OF reported that recently he picked out tiles for under their woodstove that were effective, would do the trick, and looked good. These tiles were 12-by-12 inches and only 97 cents each.
The OF and his wife piled in the truck and headed to the one of the big-box stores that have everything for the home DIY, OF. They were ready to purchase the tiles when a salesman suggested a different tile to the wife that he thought might work better.
Then he went on to show them other decorative tiles. The original selection the OF and the better half decided on when they left the house were 12-by-12 inches and 97 cents each; the fancy ones they came home with were 6-by-6 inches and $7.37 each.
A simple little job that would have cost about 16 or so dollars, wound up costing the OF over $450. You gals are lucky to have these OFs to lean on. We acquiesce to prevent days of whines and pouts.
No throw-away culture
Our normal patter about old stuff generally pops in the conversation at one time or another at every breakfast. Tuesday’s breakfast was no different.
The OFs compared old tractor engines, and engines in general, to the newer ones. This topic was geared to how good the international engines were in the Farmall tractors. (These tractors are the red ones).
One OF mentioned that he was using his Farmall cub tractor when he heard a loud bang. The OF said nothing looked out of place, the tires were fine, and tractor ran great so he had no idea what it was.
The OF told us he used the tractor for three days around his place and it started and worked as it should. Then the other day he walked by it and noticed that the whole top of the battery had blown off, but the cables were still connected. If that had happened on one of the newer tractors or in your vehicle, there would probably be one heck of a fire.
Back in the day, there was a product most every farm kept on hand which was like tar in a can. This product was used to repair cracks in batteries, and this scribe can attest to this invention because on our farm we had an old GP John Deere tractor that had a patched battery and it was the only battery that tractor ever had that this scribe can recall.
The OFs remember filling the batteries with distilled water at times and even adding battery acid. Today, changing batteries is rather routine, and they are not cheap, Magee, just part of our current throw-away culture.
Those OFs who made it to the Your Way Café in Schoharie, and sat at their tables without falling down on the ice, were: Bill Lichliter, Robie Osterman, George Washburn, Roger Chapman, Roger Shafer, Glenn Patterson, Mark Traver, John Rossmann, Gerry Irwin, Jay Francis, Mace Porter, Jack Norray, Lou Schenck, Wayne Gaul, Jim Rissacher, Ted Willsey, and me.
Location:
On Feb. 9, the Old Men of the Mountain met at the Country Café in Schoharie. This was a Tuesday, and on Tuesday, December 29, the weather was a tad nasty, and then on this Tuesday, the OFs had to content with about two inches of nuisance snow. Is this going be a year where the bad weather will happen on a Tuesday? Maybe.
Well, the Country Café was warm, and cheery — a welcome place to be early on a Tuesday morning.
The first topic was an OF’s complaint: Why did Time Warner jack up the bill by as much as 30 bucks? How do they get away with that?
One OF said that is not so much; it is a buck a day.
The other OFs said, you may be made of money but we aren’t. One OF said, if everyone thought like that and jacked up their prices only a buck a day, it would take only 10 suppliers of this, that, or the other thing to do this and, by the end of the year, we are talking big bucks, like $3,650 for the year. How do you make that up on a fixed income?
This scribe does not know how or if the subject transitioned at this time to if things are better now or when we were young. The OFs thought not, but the scribe said, yes, in most cases things are better now than then. So this scribe did a little checking, the key word here is little.
In 1970, when the United States had 203 million people, there were 16,000 murders, 350,000 robberies and 28,000 rapes.
A decade later, with a population of 225 million, there were 23,000 murders, 565,000 robberies, and 83,000 rapes.
The following decade, in 1990, there were 250 million people, again 23,000 murders, 639,000 robberies, and 84,000 rapes.
Skipping to 2014, the most recent since 2015 isn’t yet tallied, there were 319 million people, 14,000 murders, 325,000 robberies, and 84,000 rapes.
So you can see how crime in all major categories, with 116 million more people now than then, is considerably less crime than when there were fewer people. Tires last longer, cars run better and last much longer though they are nowhere near as stylish, and homes are constructed better. Medicine is better by leaps and bounds.
Conservation is beginning to take hold. Back in the day, sewage was untreated and dumped in the rivers, lakes, and streams — and winding up in the ocean. Factories dump what we now know is called hazardous waste anywhere because there were no controls stating they couldn’t.
Even based on average income, cars and houses are relatively proportionate. Food is a tad higher, but two items are way out of whack — tuition and health care cost much more than in the 1950s and proportionately so.
This is one way to look at then and now; however, stats can be bent anyway to prove anything but is some cases facts are facts.
News skews
The reason most of the OFs think times are worse now than in the past is the immediate assimilation of news from all over the world, and most of the reporting is of bad news. Naturally the OFs are going to think everything is bad because that is all they hear today, almost hourly when it happens.
There is TV, Skype, cell phones, and computers. No wonder the OFs think the world is coming to and end and, if you believe the media, it is.
This scribe says: Sit back and relax — this ole sphere has been around a long time and it still will be for a long time to come. There is only one person who knows when it will end and he isn’t telling or leaving any clues.
Talk opens with wallet
This conversation opened up when one OF took out his wallet to leave a tip, and one OF ran to get a fly swatter to swat the moths as they flew out of that wrinkled, old piece of leather. That topic was where some people kept their money.
One OF said that this guy ran a junkyard and did not trust banks so he did everything in cash, and used his money as insulation in the walls of his home. When he retired, he sold the junkyard, and had what the OF called a fire sale, and sold all the junk he could.
There must not have been a clause in the contract that said he couldn’t, and it did happen a while ago, according to this OF. The new owner was really upset when he found that many of the walls in the house were all torn apart with an ax.
Another OF said this same kind of reasoning applied in a story he had heard about an OF who hid his money in a wall behind the stove and, when he finally went to get it out of the wall, all he had was confetti because the mice had gotten into it and made nests.
Highway hazards
The OFs also discussed some of the places where they had worked. Those who had worked on the Thruway said it was dangerous.
The OFs who used this road quite a bit also mentioned the close calls they had on this stretch of highway. One said that it was people not being used to driving at 65 miles per hour, and dealing with the wind that was a big problem. Another problem was inattention of drivers not realizing how much ground is covered going this speed with a machine that weighs on the light side one ton.
The OFs who worked on the Thruway mentioned pulling the steering right or left to adjust for driving with a side wind is one of the problems. After driving at a good clip with this constant pressure on the steering wheel and then coming to a bridge that stops the wind, the vehicle will then dart right or left and, if the driver is not concentrating, the vehicle will smack right into a bridge abutment.
The Old Men of the Mountain who found their way to the Country Café in Schoharie and did not need to drive the Thruway to get there were: Roger Chapman, Bill Lichliter, Robie Osterman, George Washburn, Chuck Aelesio, Mark Traver, Glenn Patterson, John Rossmann, Harold Guest, Roger Shafer, Mace Porter, Lou Schenck, Gerry Irwin, Wayne Gaul, Jack Norray, Ted Willsey, Mike Willsey, Jim Rissacher, Elwood Vanderbilt, Harold Grippen, and me.
Location:
This Tuesday (the day the Old Men of the Mountain met) was the same day that, that rodent weather prognosticator in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania (I got the spelling from the Internet; I ain’t that smart. This is similar to people not being from this area who try to spell local names, like Schenectady, or half the towns on Long Island) was going to advise the whole Northeast what the rest of winter was going to be like.
The OFs say that rodent isn’t necessary because his predictions are generally wrong. Just ask any of the OFs who have lived on the mountain for years; they can tell what the winter will be like right down to number of snowflakes that are going to fall just by looking at the color of hills across the valley precisely at 11:36 a.m., on Jan. 10.
That will be as correct as any rodent shaken out of a great nap by a bunch of Norman Rockwell-type old goats, in tall hats can predict. Howeve,r that groundhog is a lot like a construction worker because they whistle at perspective mates. When the groundhog is awake that is.
Treacherous ice
This brought the OFs to talking about the ice on the ponds and lakes this year, specifically how little there is of it, and, if there is any, how treacherous it may be. One OF reported that there were some ice fishing shanties out on Thompson’s Lake and the ice is so thin at the shoreline that planks are laid down so those stupid enough to go out and fish could go across open water to get to their shanties out on the lake.
One OF said they had better be pretty good swimmers if they do head out to fish. It has been a very open winter so far, and the OFs are hoping we do get substantial snowfall sometime before the winter is out because the wells and reservoirs will need the water.
One OF did mention that, a couple of years ago, we had plenty of snow and still there was a water shortage the following summer. The OFs couldn’t argue with this OG because they were unable to recall this particular weather event.
More than one way to fry an egg
Many of the OFs are good cooks, some because their moms taught them how when they were young, and others by necessity, and some because they went for beauty instead of brains and were forced to learn how. One OF started giving a brief lesson on how to take care of the pots and pans especially when making fried eggs and bacon.
This OF said, “Keep your eye on the bacon and don’t let it burn because once that starts the eggs will stick to the pan where the bacon burned.”
One OF said he didn’t have that problem because he uses two pans. What? Now you have two pans to clean.
Start cooking the bacon first, then throw the eggs in after the bacon is cooked some, that way the bacon grease is used for the eggs.
“Nah,” was a reply. “That way, everything is too greasy. I take the bacon out and put it on some paper towels to soak up the grease.”
“That spoils the whole thing,” came a response. “By the time the eggs are done, the bacon is cold.”
“No, it isn’t,” was the answer. “I cook the eggs in another pan.”
“Not another two-pan job for simply frying up two or three eggs and bacon for breakfast,” was the comment.
“You guys have it all wrong. I throw in half a stick of butter, then the bacon; when that is about ready, I crack in three eggs, and there is about an eighth of an inch of grease in the pan. After that, I put my plate over the pan for a little while (that warms up the plate) then I take the spatula and wave some of that grease over the eggs. When the eggs are the way I like them, I take them out, and the toast off the back of the stove and I am ready to go.”
“All that fat, what about your cholesterol?” was asked.
“What about it?” the reply was. “My last check-up it was 150 which is not that bad.”
“When was that check up?” an OF inquired. “When you were ten years old?”
Droning on
The OFs discussed drones again, and how in the Netherlands the Dutch National Police are training eagles to hunt down drones and attack them.
One OF said, if he sees a drone over his property, if he can’t get his shotgun in time to shoot it down, he will throw rocks at it. If this OF brings down the drone, he better hope that it doesn’t land on someone’s head.
The subject came up again how most technology, not all, but most, generally is an improvement. Tuesday morning, the discussion was on tools. It was mentioned how much safer most tools are these days, and how much easier they are to work with.
One OF mentioned the Hougen magnetic drill and cutters. The OF said they used to have to climb poles and drill holes in steel for the appropriate fastener. This process took two men and a boy to handle the drill to drill the hole, and, when the hole was about through, the bit would catch and the drill would spin and twist your arm, or snap your wrist, or could even knock you off the pole.
Along comes this Hougen tool, and one guy carries it up with little effort, sticks the drill to the steel and just feeds the cutter in and the tool does all the work. No more dangling from a harness because the drill has twisted the OF around and dislodged him from the pole.
Those Old Men of the Mountain who are lucky enough to escape the pitfalls of farming and heavy industry, sundry wars, and the occasional whack with a frying pan and make it to Mrs. K’s Restaurant in Middleburgh were: Harold Guest, Bill Lichliter, Dave Williams, Roger Chapman, John Rossmann, Robie Osterman, George Washburn, Miner Stevens, Glenn Patterson, Chuck Aelesio, Mark Traver, Roger Shafer, Mace Porter, Wayne Gaul, Lou Schenck, Bob Fink, Bob Benninger, Jim Rissacher, Ted Willsey, Bill Herzog, Ellwood Vanderbilt, Harold Grippen, and me.