MIDDLEBURGH — On this 24th day of February, we OMOTM convened our old selves in Middleburgh at Mrs. K’s Diner, right in the heart of charming downtown Middleburgh, far from the madding crowd, which is apparently far enough from the Walmarts and the Lowe’ses of the world to still have some interesting independent businesses.
For example, the hardware store a few doors away from Mrs. K’s is worth touring even if you don’t need nuts, bolts, rakes, or shovels. Amazingly, a vintage pickup truck even lives up on the second floor.
Mrs. K’s has lots of seating for us, including a big round table near the front and a long table that seats most of us earlier birds. If you google Mrs. K’s, you find it is well represented on the internet, describing it as a homey atmosphere with comfort food served by friendly staff.
This certainly is true, and we are made to feel most welcome here. Our coffee cups are always refilled in a timely fashion by Carolyn, while Angela takes and delivers orders, with I guess Patty in the kitchen, though Patty is too busy preparing food to be visible most of the time.
Not today
Many topics are covered in these weekly gatherings, and it must be admitted that it is a challenge to be sure on what day what was said, but it is all important to disclose. It may have been last week when a story about a hammer vs. a wrench was told.
It seems a young man, now an OMOTM, purchased a hammer at a local store and returned it when the hammer turned out to be the wrong tool, and a wrench was needed instead. This was before Amazon returns, where no questions are asked and no personal interest is involved in the transaction.
The young man was questioned, and it seems rebuked, for his misguided purchase.
Another story was told regarding a local youth who was thought to have freckles until it was discovered that, while he rode in the back seat of the car and all the windows were down, the driver was in the habit of spitting tobacco juice out the window.
Can you think of anything in that story that would be consistent with the world we live in today?
Historic honor guard
One of our members with an old army vehicle belongs to a group of others possessing such remarkable memorabilia.
He reports that these folks and their memorabilia will be forming an honor guard escort for the remains of 44 Revolutionary War veterans recently discovered near Lake George where they will be interred on May 22.
You may note that some of these vehicles appear in the Memorial Day events in Berne, and elsewhere in our area.
Mourning zerks
Complaints have been heard regarding grease fittings, or rather the lack of them. Those who go back a few years will remember zerks everywhere on equipment of all kinds that allowed joints to be greased with a grease gun, whereas today, we have what are purported to be joints that never need grease.
Nobody at the table was buying that notion. Hence, home solutions were discussed, one of which involved installing zerks where they are needed, which is just about everywhere a joint requires lubrication, contrary to contemporary marketing.
On the same subject, after discussing the high cost of repairs, it was concluded that lubrication was much cheaper than parts.
Tractors delight
Tractors, their love and care, maintenance, and many features and issues that require our special care and insights, rank high on the list of subject matter at these breakfasts.
The relative reliability of the older ones, even older than some of those at Mrs. K’s on Tuesday morning, was a discussion point. A Ford 9N and Ford 2N were lauded for starting perfectly in the spring even after a long winter of rest under tarps and snow.
Of special interest was a farm equipment sale some will attend in Syracuse later in the week.
Elder objections
Ubiquitous caps worn backwards rankle many an OMOTM. Several problems may exist with this habit adopted by the youth in our lives.
As an aside, a Greek philosopher is quoted as saying thousands of years ago that the youth of his day would never amount to anything, probably not due to hats, but something.
So this is the first problem suggested here: Us resisting that which is different and so suspect.
Second problem may be the utility of the habit. Does a cap work better when worn backwards? Do we need a government study to explore this notion?
The third explanation may be that we OMOTM object, so there is a motivation in itself. Even the Greek kids back 2,500 years ago needed to get their elders’ attention somehow.
Finding ourselves within spitting distance of the spring equinox and longer days and greening grass, yet still amid blowing and drifting snow, and with the lurking threat of more snow and ice, and appreciating the ambiance of Mrs. K’s, in the splendid village of Middleburgh, so pleased to be renewing our acquaintances and sharing common hopes and worries, and awakening and refreshing old memories were Harold Guest, Wally Guest, Ed Goff, Robert Schanz, Mark Traver, Glenn Patterson, Joe Rack, Rich Albertin, Will Lickliter, Roger W. Shafer, Jamey Darrah, Roland Tozer, Frank A. Fuss, Rev. Jay Francis, Al Schager, Herb Bahrmann, Chuck Batcher, Warren Willsey, John Jaz, Gerry Cross, Dick Dexter, Jack Norray, John Williams - Scribe Emeritus, Lou Schenck, Elwood Vanderbilt, Bob Donnelly, Dave Hodgetts, Paul Guiton, Alan DeFazio, John Dab, Gerry Chartier, and me.
MIDDLEBURGH — On the 17th day of February, we found ourselves at the most southern of our breakfast hangouts, the Middleburg Diner, at the crossroads of Cotton Hill Road and Route 145, heading south out of Middleburg.
From the direction of Berne, you can take the roads over the hills which are either very scenic or very scary, depending on the season, or stick to the longer flatland route through Schoharie. Also, if you are prone to getting lost, on the over-the-hill route, you might like to know that you may lose GPS contact when you are at your most vulnerable.
This diner has a long dining room at one end, which seems just designed for us, with a long table down the middle that accommodates most of us, and a few smaller tables along the side for overflow or later comers. The regular Middleburghers have the advantage here of finding seating at the far other end of the diner where they can enjoy their breakfast in relative peace.
The dredging up of many past loves of the vehicular kind on this day included Kaiser Frazers, Henry Js, Hudsons, Crosleys, Nashes, and Metropolitans. Some were said to have evolved from World War II production lines, reverting back from making tanks to making cars again.
Hitchhiking advice
Further cementing the notion that there is much to be learned from OMOTM, came a very useful tip regarding hitchhiking, which may have been more common in earlier times.
Just standing by the road with a thumb out gives no explanation as to motives, and some might be suspect.
But if you can manage to have an empty gas can in your hand, you may get a lift more readily because your need is easily apparent and can be interpreted as harmless.
Verbal bologna
Bologna and how it should be sliced to please demanding customers at the deli counter gave rise to a further consideration. Verbal bologna was also found to be sliced thin or thick depending on the intent of the slicer or the interpretation of those on the receiving end.
Hilltown genealogy
Exploration of the genealogy of the Hilltowns always inspires speculations around the breakfast table as to who was or is related to whom. Some of us have few or no local relatives, and some are linked by expansive webs of relations.
It seems there may be only a few names it all started from, but the problems begin when some are called to admit to their heritage.
The uniqueness of some of our predecessors is a point of pride, as such characters are just not to be found elsewhere. It could be argued that a lot of this uniqueness survives to this day and around this table.
Harmony at home
Many of our discussions focus on maintaining harmony at home, and also with others and in other situations, of course.
As a guide to maintaining this pleasant state, and keeping in mind how to act when provoked, some of us have considered a list of rules. This is going to be similar to other such lists, but more localized and focused on everyday issues.
“Do not kill” seems obvious and is already covered by those higher-level lists, and maybe subject to copyright laws.
We propose for a first entry: “Stay in your own lane.”
This could perhaps be edict Number 2, given that somebody might come up with a Number 1 that has more gravitas.
Following up on the previous thoughts regarding the web of relations, a candidate for rule one might be, “Don’t disparage anyone since you can’t be sure who is related to whom. Also it just isn’t nice.” Suggestions for other entries are welcome and will be considered, all in the interest of keeping order.
Plethora
In the discussion of those who are sick or very sick or in hospitals or nursing homes, it seems that there are many of these folks who concern us.
The operative word in this particular discussion was “plethora,” which might be a good word to add to our vocabularies if it isn’t already there.
However, there was yet another concern: Where is the accent in “plethora?” Is it “PLEthora” or “pleTHORA?”
Not to beat this poor dead horse too much, but it has been suggested that folks who learned this word in conversation may be familiar with the first pronunciation, whereas those who learned the word from their reading, may have chosen the latter. Hence, a possible way to identify the readers among us. This at least distracted us for a time from the real worry about a seeming plethora of our ailing friends.
The right direction
The far reachingness of this column is hard to imagine on most days, but after a comment in a previous edition regarding the relative lack of appreciation in some circles for the heroic efforts of clearing snow, it was reported that yet another spouse has recently taken pictures of an OMOTM clearing snow, expressing, it would seem, recognition of this heroic effort.
This was just to acknowledge a step perceived to be in the right direction.
The Scribe made the comment on this day that new material for this column was always welcome, and indeed, it is. This precipitated an avalanche of amazing insights and observations, some of which will have to keep for a later date.
Enjoying the warmer weather, but now anticipating ice and slushy driveways, and finding the long room at the Middleburg Diner a great place to share great memories and the exploits of long ago, were Harold Guest, Wally Guest, Ed Goff, Miner Stevens, Will Lickliter, Frank A. Fuss, Robert Schanz, Roland Tozer, Rev. Jay Francis, Al Schager, Warren Willsey, Gerry Chartier, Chuck Batcher, Lou Schenck, John Jaz, Jack Norray, Gerry Cross, Dick Dexter, and me.
NEW SCOTLAND — On this 10th day of February, while we pondered weak and weary, oops, that regards a bird of a different feather. We ventured out to the eastern-most of our breakfast rendezvous, the Windowbox in Slingerlands, sort of across the road from what many locals may remember as the cow house, where cows lazed easily and contentedly on the porch of a house that may have been grand in its day, but was for years enjoyed only by cows.
Bob and his crew, most notably Mariah, who took our orders and served us with grace and charm, welcomed us past the window box, which does exist, true to its name right as you step in the door. The box does seem to be lacking flowers at the moment however.
Some reaction was received regarding comments last week about OWOTM as opposed to OMOTM. Comments ranged from “good idea” to “bad idea” depending on the interpretation. This is a spot from which you can only dig yourself in deeper, so probably best to let it lie. To mention sleeping dogs at this point may be highly inadvisable.
Connoisseurs
This next commentary is only to acknowledge the existence of the conversation, but we OMOTM are indeed connoisseurs of sorts of breakfast restaurants, though our main interest is in greeting the day with friends, seeing who survived the week and in what condition, etc.
Back to connoisseuring, some elements of judgement are heard to be, of course, prices, quality of various food items: for example, home fries, which are very good at the Windowbox. Also up for comparison are: pancakes, sausages, links or patties, fluffy eggs, seating arrangements, echo or not for less-than-high quality ears, and speed and efficiency of coffee delivery.
In the interest of preserving the welcome that we receive everywhere, no valuation attempt will be made here. I venture to say, in the interest of keeping the peace, that all of these quality points probably average out quite well over our venues; somebody has fluffier eggs, but somebody has crispier sausage, and back to letting the sleeping dogs lie.
Winter weary and winter wear
Unless the scribe missed it, there was no mention of Groundhog Day last week. Phil was said to have seen his shadow this year, indicating six more weeks of wintery weather are yet to be faced. Having endured as much as we have at this point in our journey, perhaps a little more or less winter is low on the issues that upset us, plus there was that winter of ’56, or some such year, which upstages all winters forever.
Two of our number are seen some days lately to be wearing amazing, room-dominating, coon-skin hats, totally appropriate to the season. These hats are huge and beautiful, and really should receive a fanfare when they enter the room!
Teaming with topics
The Super Bowl did not seem to cause much excitement for the group; however, there were mixed and more excited reviews of the half-time show. Even the alternate half-time show got some honorable mentions. The conclusion might be that we are more enamored by local attractions.
The subject of attention to dental requirements, appointments, expenses, and insurance was on the table, along with ice, and boy do we have a lot of it to contend with, and boy is it threatening. We do not slide so gracefully over and around it as we once might have.
Vintage 1860s local maps were brought to breakfast for inspection. Few of the homes we see today were on the maps, but it was most interesting to see which homes and buildings existed back that long ago. You could take a stand on either side of progress, but we do need to live and shop somewhere. The deer and the bears and the coyotes who once had so much openness to enjoy were not consulted for their opinions.
There was an interesting view put forward regarding the relative cost of heating with wood versus oil. Maybe somebody will or has done the math on that. They say wood warms you repeatedly when you consider all of the exercise involved in bringing it all the way to your stove. Cutting, hauling, cutting, splitting, chopping, hauling, stacking, loading, ash removal, etc.
A detailed study was undertaken by one of our number regarding the volume of requests for donations received from various not-for-profit organizations. On the as-advertised merits of these requests and the appealing bribes, stickers, cards, address labels, even pictures of worthy recipients, you may only be able to resist based on the sheer unaffordability of the appeals.
A popular recognition was made regarding the enormous value of keeping spouses happy. It was heartily concluded that this was very important and a priority, to be overlooked at your peril.
Enjoying the slightly warmer weather, but still enduring the lingering ice and snow, and finding the Windowbox a great place to meet, greet, eat, and share our many challenges, successes, and well, let’s leave it there, were Harold Guest, Wally Guest, Roland Tozer, Marty Herzog, Frank A. Fuss, Will Lickliter, Ed Goff, Rich Albertin, Chuck Batcher, Robert Schanz, Rev. Jay Francis, Al Schager, John Williams, Lou Schenck, Warren Willsey, Bob Donnelly, Dave Hodgetts, Jake Herzog, Jack Norray, John Jaz, Gerry Cross, Paul Guiton, John Dab, and me.
PRINCETOWN — On the third day of February, the OMOTM descended on the Chuck Wagon Restaurant in Princetown, which was, by the way, operated from 1956 to 1976 in Champaign, Illinois, now complete with the diner’s original sign. As is his usual custom, Ron greeted us with a smile and lots of coffee, and Chris took our orders and delivered them with amazing speed and accuracy.
We enjoy a welcome at all of the restaurants we frequent, but the locals do suffer from being pushed to the sidelines in favor of our overwhelming numbers and our boisterous enthusiasm to greet the morning and each other. A certain consternation may be seen on the faces of some of the displaced who were hoping perhaps for more peace and quiet in the company of the more regular patrons.
OMOTM or not, diners in the mornings seem to be dominated by old men. It makes you wonder where the old women are. Are they happy to see us off and out of their hair for a spell, or do they not like breakfast? OWOTM, where are you, and what is your position on this?
Heroes clear snow
In regard to what we OMOTM agree are heroic efforts to make walkways and driveways navigable, there are significant strategies to this operation. Snowblowers, plows, pickups, tractors, shear pins, where to put the snow, how to keep the banks under control so they can be ready to accept the next snow.
A handy tip emerged from this discussion about waxing snowplows or blowers to allow snow to slide to the side with more ease.
Our expertise and equipment varies from shovels to big dump trucks, but one thing we noted was a typical response from those who are shielded from all this valiant effort.
“I got the driveway cleared.”
“OK.”
“OK?” St. George slayed a dragon and received years of acclaim. Isn’t clearing the driveway on that level? We’d like to think so.
One exceptional spouse was said to have taken pictures of her guy in this heroic role, an attitude which would be nice to encourage.
Taking names
In order to give credit where credit is due, we pass around a paper and pen for all of us old attendees to jot down our names as best we can recall and write them. Wives and significant others want to know if we really went to breakfast, or what have we been doing on Tuesday mornings?
There has been a humorous side to this listing of names where such folks as Ernie Banks and Gary Burghoff have found themselves listed. Whereas this seemingly provides the perpetrators of the fraud with great joy, it is a challenge to the scribe to ferret out the deceit.
On the other hand, if some name slips through, how would we prove Ernie or Gary weren’t there?
Barbering
Hair is a subject that some of us show less and less interest in as time goes on, but it still needs some attention. Where and when the attention occurs is sometimes on the Hill and sometimes off the Hill, some more or less personal.
The general consensus was that hair is a good thing, but our needs are more basic, as the emphasis is now on real important functionality, though we suspect vanity could still play a role here for some.
Scholars of history and apricity
More than one OMOTM has been heard to ask, at the end of breakfast, “Well, did you learn anything?”
And actually that is a good question, because the likelihood of learning something on Tuesday morning is pretty good.
History is what we are best at, that and how to repair historical things like old cars and old plumbing. The subject of old plumbing can get pretty personal, so perhaps we’ll leave that for another time.
Back to history, it is interesting to note, for example, how many gas stations, convenience stores, bars, dairy farms, and churches there were when we were in our youth, and when the economy was more local.
The economics are puzzling, though the success of this may have been in shorter commutes to places like Walmart, lower profit expectations, and higher expectations of personal service. Some gas-station owners, for example, were known to live above the station, and emerge whenever needed to provide service with a personal touch.
On the subject of learning, “apricity” could be the new, though a bit archaic, word of the morning, and relevant to the slowly changing over of the seasons. This refers to the warmth of the sun in winter. Used as appropriate for this morning, “This Tuesday dawned with grudging apricity.”
Braving the grudging apricity and the bright crunchy snow and cold and the early hour, and enjoying all the Chuck Wagon charm and the wisdom of our ages, were: Harold Guest, Wally Guest, Ed Goff, Roland Tozer, Chuck Batcher, Warren Willsey, Rich Albertin, Will Lickliter, Frank A. Fuss, Jamey Darrah, Lou Schenk, John Williams, Herb Bahrmann, Paul Guitan, Jack Norray, John Jaz, Jerry Cross, Dick Dexter, Bob Donley, Elwood Van Derbilt, Dave Hodgetts, Ted Feurer, Jake Lederman, Mark Traver, Joe Rack, Glenn Patterson, Roger Shafer, Pastor Jay Francis, Al Schager, Robert Schanz, and me.
DELANSON — On this 27th day of January, the day after the cleanup from the about 20-inch snowstorm, the OMOTM put in a strong showing at Gibby’s restaurant in Delanson. Gibby’s has been opening on Tuesday mornings for us even though they aren’t normally open on Tuesdays.
Kudos also to Gibby’s for the beautifully cleared out parking lot ready for us at 7 a.m. Accommodation and food were also great, as usual. While we’re on the subject of Gibby’s, it should be noted that the new owners have kept the look and feel of the place the same as it has been for years, a smart move since so many people have loved it for so long.
I’m not sure how I got this scribe job, but one important part of the appointment surely is that everybody else is happy with coming out to eat with friends on Tuesday mornings but doesn’t want to be worried about recapping the event later.
I’m viewing this first foray as scribe as a trial for me, and an opportunity for the rest of the OFs to decide that they would be better served by someone else taking a stab at this. Don’t everybody line up at once.
Avoiding turbulence
A general observation I would make about our 30 or so OFs who gather every Tuesday morning is that this is a crew that shows great restraint to avoid controversial topics that could be divisive. A few times I have noted somebody venturing into turbulent waters, but it quickly becomes apparent that this is a blunder, and a retreat is quickly enacted, to the relief of the others.
We are blessed by some very talented wait staff who make allowances for our shortcomings. One shortcoming we do not have is a general goodwill, which we show to each and all.
But we are a little short of memory and also hearing, so our servers have to take a lot of responsibility for what we ordered and who ordered it. Not only is it likely that we don’t have a clear memory of what we ordered, but then hearing what is being delivered can be a little muffled in our old ears.
Who ordered, “blah blah blah?” “What?” etc. This came to a head a couple of years ago when a waitress did not understand the issues, and we experienced stress over who ordered what. This particular crisis is still remembered by many.
Some of us arrive on Tuesdays one at a time, but some carpool. Now carpooling is fun and convenient, and sometimes necessary, depending on driving skills and whether or not you have good tires on your car, but it does restrict you to whom you sit with and converse with.
Coming as a onesie means you may mix with others you don’t know so well. This can be a great experience. I’ve observed that everyone at the breakfasts has much to share after so much of the experience of living.
Solving problems
Some of us OFs are seen to be saving Tuesday mornings as a resource. For example, if you don’t know how to approach a rough running engine or a leaky faucet or perhaps a tractor that needs overhauling, this is the place to be.
There will be great enthusiasm in solving some of these problems. You may get conflicting advice, but certainly a lot of food for thought to supplement the food for breakfast.
One area that was explored on Tuesday morning was chicken and turkey management. Conflicting views had chickens seen as smart, the other as not so smart.
I think the not-so-smart view dominated, with a recollection of one particularly early-morning rooster meeting an untimely end, rewarded for his enthusiasm for greeting the day too early once too often.
A turkey was also credited with chasing a mail carrier down the road, thinking the mail in her hands was food. Refuge was found in a passing car.
Another topic of the morning was a popular outcry, railing against the self-serving nature of big business; in this case, specifically, in the mileage of vehicles.
It was generally agreed that better vehicle mileage could have been achieved through technology, which would have served motorists, rather than the industry that profits from us spending our hard-earned wages liberally. Thus, the group’s assertion that this technology has been repressed.
Braving the snow and cold and the early hour, and enjoying all the Gibby’s ambiance and the wisdom of our ages, were: Harold Guest, Wally Guest, Will Lichliter, Rich Albertin, Robert Schanz, Chuck Batcher, Warren Willsey, Roger Shafer, Joe Rack, Mark Traver, Pastor Jay Francis, Jamey Darrah, Frank A. Fuss, John Dab, Paul Guiton, John Williams (Scribe Emeritus), John Jaz, Lou Schenck, Jack Norray, Dick Dexter, Gerry Cross, Alan DeFazio, Elwood Vanderbilt, Dave Hodgetts, Bob Donnelly, and me.
The Old Men of the Mountain’s basically, first meal of the day, although some may sneak a cup of coffee and piece of toast really early in the morning, was at Mrs. K’s in Middleburgh on Jan. 13.
The routine of many of the OFs is taking pills before meals so that group of OFs has to take those things with a sip of water before heading out. That doesn’t count though as a pre-breakfast snack.
Sometimes it feels like the OFs need a brief course in chemistry just to follow the instructions on how to take some of their medications.
The OFs, as everyone knows, were once YFs and when, as one of the YFs, many of the job opportunities that have been around since 2000 were not around at that time, some not even thought of. The OFs were talking about marketing and advertising in an indirect way.
The table this scribe was at was television ads and those in them. Sometimes, the OFs thought the commercials were better than the shows they are sponsoring.
One OF thought some of the ads are so clever that whatever the product in the commercial is supposed to be for is not even remembered. The spokespeople for some of the products are more remembered than movie stars and politicians.
The OGs thought of Flo in the Progressive ads, the Liberty guy with the emu, the girl for Curtis Lumber who used to do Raymor and Flannigan, the girl in the Toyota ads, the Gecko for Geico, the Aflac duck, as well as the mayhem guy for Allstate.
There are some others, but the point is given about acting or working for an advertising agency that works with marketing people of many companies large and small. One OF in a conversation with his wife said she thought about how long some of these people have been spokespersons that they must be grandmothers and grandfathers by now.
The OF said she added that we should give accolades out to the makeup artist because these spokespeople still look young to her. This prompted this OF to check out to see what these people made or are worth and for some it is in the millions.
Nice paying job opportunities that were not around when the OFs were YFs. Who would have thunk-it.
Tattoos and nose rings
One of the topics that came up, as far as the column is concerned by this scribe, appears to be redundant and that is tattoos. Across the street from Mrs. K’s and down towards the creek, about 500 feet, is a tattoo studio.
From the seat the OF had who brought it up, this OF was able to read the sign in the window (which, by the way, is nicely done) and is a good indication this is not a match-heated needle and India ink operation.
The OFs thought, to go along with advertising and marketing positions, another one that should be great in the coming generations is that of a dermatologist. One OF thought there is going to be a shortage of this type of doctor because of all the tattoos.
Some getting infected, others being removed because some jerk had Mary tattooed on his chest and he married Jane. Another OF said as far as he can tell the ladies are no slouch in the tattoo game either, it might just as well be Joe on one boob, Sam on the other, but she married Alfonso.
The ladies sprout these tattoos as much as the men, and one OF said, “Yeah, but guys equal it out by wearing earrings.”
Another form of cutting the cord, one OF thought, is getting the nose pierced for a nose ring. What in the world for? thought the OFs.
What do you do when you sneeze, and a booger hangs from the ring, or how do you even blow your nose with that thing in the way? One OG added a touch of humor to the conversation by interjecting that the ring might be a good way to stop from picking your nose, because half the time your finger would get stuck in the ring.
All the OFs did to rebel in their younger years was to get a duck-style hair cut. Well, not just that — we did other things, an OF mentioned, like rolling a pack of cigarettes in the sleeve of a T-shirt.
One OF said he had a friend who did not smoke and cut a block of wood the size of a pack of cigarettes and rolled that in his sleeve just to look cool.
This scribe thought when we are young, just to fit in, we are going to figure out some way to die at an early age. Years’ past, it was either with the cigarettes, and now it seems to be tats or drugs or both.
What’s next? Ah, really it’s only a bunch of OFs yakking but there sure is a lot of “been there-done that” in this group.
The guys in this bunch of “been there-done that” group who showed up at Mrs. K’s in Middleburgh were: Harold Guest, Wally Guest, Ed Goff, Will Lichliter, George Washburn, Jamey Darrah, Frank Fuss, Joe Rack, Glenn Patterson, Mark Traver, Rich Albertin, Roger Shafer, Frank Dees, Chuck Batcher, Warren Willsey, Marty Herzog, Herb Bahrmann, Jerry Cross, Jack Norray, John Jazz, Lou Schenck, Bob Donnelly, Elwood Vanderbilt, Dave Hodgetts, Allan DeFazzo, John Dab, Paul Guiton, and me, and God made us as pretty as we are, we don’t need no tattoos although many of the OFs have them, and some of the tats are now just black blobs.
MIDDLEBURGH — The first breakfast of the New Year was held Tuesday, Jan. 6,, at the Middleburgh Diner in Middleburgh. It was a typical January day: cold, snow on the ground, a nip to the early morning air, but off the OFs went to one of the original diners for the OMOTM.
It is sometimes sad to go over the list of names of when the OMOTM started. The three guys who started this nefarious group were Herbie Wolford, Ivan Baker, and Joe Farkus.
Those three plus all the others who have joined them are enjoying their breakfast now from their heavenly realm watching those of us down here having to deal with the winters (those OFs who stay in the Northeast anyway and don’t run away to warmer climes like some of the others). Hmm. Could there be a touch of jealousy hidden in that sentence somewhere?
There were lots of miscellaneous conversations going on Tuesday morning. One was about shopping for another scribe within the group. This OF at times has trouble waking up, and one of these days this OF might wake up and find himself sitting at a booth with Herbie, Ivan, Joe and that large group of other OFs joining in.
Fortunately one scribe volunteer has come forward; however, this OF will be in Florida for the next three weeks.
Serendipitous phoning
How often does it happen when we butt dial or phone a number we never intended to dial, or dial a number so completely off the number we planned on dialing that so not even a number of either phone matches with one the OF wanted, and for one reason or another speaking to the wrong one turns out right or necessary.
This happened to a couple of OFs and the intended caller of the callers reached were so far off it made no sense, yet reaching the butt-called OF was necessary and important and pertained to the OFs with an upcoming meeting.
Continuing with phones: Almost all the OFs have run into this problem dealing with phone menus and AI, and in many cases never being able to reach the party the OF wanted to reach. Most of the culprits are cases dealing with doctor’s offices, banks, and large corporations.
About the only ones that have menus that are halfway understandable are car dealerships. As one OF put it, they keep it simple because they don’t want to lose a sale on a $30,000 vehicle or get the OF ticked off on service so the OF goes someplace else.
The question was: If car dealerships can do it simply, why can’t the others?
One OF suggested that might be because we OFs never really learned how to think like a computer. We were taught ABCD, not 0 and 1 so we don’t understand how computers think and therefore don’t talk computer talk.
Another OF added, “Yeah. If the OF gets really ticked off and starts yelling at a real person that person might get ticked, or upset, but an AI computer doesn’t care. The OF can blow off steam all he wants — the machine doesn’t know if the OF is shouting or whispering.”
Ah! Just as in this case, give me the good old days when the OF was able to hear a person breathing on the other end of the line. Ever notice when talking to a machine, there are no indications of breathing?
Weather reports
Listening to the weather reports, more often than not during inclement weather, the reports scare the living daylights out of some of the OFs and the reports might be right at times, but not for a couple inches of snow.
Listening to the reports on the evening news quite often makes the OF skittish of heading out the next day.
Such was the case for the a.m. trip to the Middleburgh Diner, yet the OFs who are true Northeasters said, “What the heck! Once they start measuring it in feet I’ll think about not heading to the Middleburgh Diner!”
Those OFs were (and we start with the usual): Harold Guest, Wally Guest, Ed Goff, Albert Raymond, Will Lichliter, George Washburn, Frank Fuss, Robert Shanz, Russ Pokorny, Frank Dees, Chuck Batcher, Warren Willsey, Lou Schenck, Jack Norray, Dick Dexter, Gerry Cross, and me.
NEW SCOTLAND — On Tuesday Morning, Dec. 30, the Old Men of the Mountain traveled to one of their most distant eating establishments — the Window Box Café in New Scotland.
One of the discussions of the breakfast, at a few of the tables at least, was the wind. With just a tad of snow (by our standards) on the ground, when that wind got into it and blew it across the roads in spots, some of the OFs ran into a few surprises on their way to the restaurant.
Most all of the OFs are retired, and in the beginning of the OMOTM were from the Hill and the small country schools of Berne-Knox-Westerlo and Schoharie. Both schools handled kids from hardscrabble farms of the Helderbergs, and a few from the valley floor of Schoharie.
Now the OMOTM is a group of OFs who share breakfast from all over — not many farmers left. This led to a discussion with an OF who has been retired for only three years, so he is a “young-un.”
The job he retired from was one that many of the OFs wondered about at times. That was, where does the number of people working or not working that comes out each month come from? The “Jobs Report?”
Well, this recently retired OF is one of those who collected and analyzed the information that generated this report. There is a lot that goes into it and it is not some guy at a corner desk throwing darts at a graph on a wall. It is apparently worked on by many, and though in the end it is still a guess, it is a darn accurate guess, and at times can be right on the money.
Sports out of hand
Some of the OFs (believe it or not) were young at one time, and in their youth played sports. In the days the OFs were playing sports, the professionals were also playing sports and the salaries were nothing like what they are today.
The OFs at our table talked about how things may have gotten out of hand, like stadiums: What stadiums are like today and the teams demanding not necessarily larger, but better stadiums. The part the OFs don’t understand is they want us to pay for them.
Then an OF said, after our taxes pay for the stadium, some charge an arm and leg to go see a game so that the professional sports are only for the rich. That was the basis of discussion.
However, a stadium and team or teams are big draws because they encourage the growth of restaurants, motels and hotels, stores, and more police and firemen. The stadium is now an industry like a cement plant or steel mill. A football player is like a chunk of clinker, or a billet of steel.
Mourning Doug Marshall
A topic that was at most tables was the sudden passing of our scribe, Doug Marshall. From what the OMOTM understood in the beginning was that Doug would come out all right after the removal of the tumor in his bladder … Apparently that was not the case and we lost Doug to the heavens on Christmas Day.
His family will receive visitors at the Applebee Funeral Home in Delmar on Saturday, Jan. 17, from 1 to 4 p.m.
Those OMOTM who made sure the tank was full, the tires up and traveled to the Window Box Café in New Scotland were: Harold Guest, Wally Guest, Ed Goff, Frank Fuss, Robert Schanz, Al Schager, Pastor Jay Francis, Lou Schenck, Bill Bremmer, John Jaz, Frank Dees, Chuck Batcher, Russ Pokorny, Warren Willsey, Gerry Cross, Jack Norray, Dick Dexter, Elwood Vanderbilt, Dave Hodgetts, Bob Donnelly, John Dab, Paul Guiton, Alan Defazzo, Jake Herzog with his daughter and son-in-law as guests, and me.
MIDDLEBURGH — Wow! Just 30 more days till Christmas. Twenty years ago, that would have been plenty of time, but today they start touting Christmas while the leaves on the trees are still green. This OF thinks it is to remind people of the color of money and the stores want it.
On Nov. 25, Mrs. K’s Kitchen wafted the morning breakfast aroma out through the valley and into the hills, and like a well-trained coon hound the OMOTM picked up on this and sniffed their way to the source.
Once there, the OFs began to cover the events to them that mattered over the last week. Strange how not much of it was current events, but what the OFs had or did in the smoky memory of the past.
This covered everything from food, to, of course, cars. There was considerable time jumping on what Mom used to cook, and what is considered food today. One or the other, the pallet has changed or the memory.
Memory of black-strap molasses with a little sugar on bread as a snack or dessert, or homemade butter on toast with a little sugar for the same thing. The OFs thought that, if we offered that to a kid today, the kid would choke on it.
Hesitant on hybrids
A current event was a couple of OFs discussing, what else, vehicles older versus new. Apparently this was not necessarily all about the new engine-powered covered wagons, but the rushing of technology before it had been well tested and ready for production to the masses.
Strange, this scribe has heard from a couple others involving the hybrids. After a little while of running them, they begin to have problems. The scribe thought that it was just one or two vehicles, but then the OMOTM started complaining about the same type of problem.
Maybe this type of vehicle should go back to the drawing board before the whole concept is soured and nobody wants them. Lecture for the day.
Luck changes
As has become a tradition, an OF (Frank Dees) supplies a turkey to be raffled off the gathering before Thanksgiving. The breakfast of Nov 25 was no different. The raffle was held and an erstwhile OF won.
The names were drawn from a shopping bag by a waitress, and included in the raffle were a few of the regular patrons of the restaurant. As an aside here, all the patrons, and of course the OMOTM were guys, old guys, the only ladies this scribe could see were Angela, Carol, out front, and Patty in the kitchen.
Three ladies taking care of 42 basically OFs. The scribe thinks: Ask three guys to do the same thing and they would b---- the whole time.
The erstwhile OF who won the turkey mentioned that he never wins anything; well, today his luck was changed by the OFs. And he is now taking charge of a frozen, dead bird.
Rising prices
A couple of OFs who are true farmers, and still active in the profession, were in a discussion at the end of the long table and one could tell it was not retro but current, very current, and it appeared to be on prices and how fast they are increasing.
If this scribe was able to discern any of the conversation, it would be that one of the products they have to purchase to remain in business rose 30 percent between deliveries. Does not seem right.
The smell of bacon frying in a pan with eggs, and pancakes, home fries, sausage, or hash on the side, maybe even the whole kit and caboodle, would lure anybody, not only the OMOTM, to Mrs. K’s Kitchen in Middleburgh but the OMOTM who did follow their noses were: Harold Guest, Wally Guest, Ed Goff, Frank Fuss, Joe Rack, Mark Traver, Glenn Patterson, Roger Shafer, Rich Albertin, Randy Barber, Robert Schanz, Pastor Jay Francis, Jamey Darrah, Al Schager, Russ Pokorny, Chuck Batcher, Warren Willsey, Frank Dees, John Jazz, Gerry Cross, Jack Norray, Dick Dexter, David L. Wood, Henry Whipple, Dave Hodgetts, Elwood Vanderbilt, Bob Donnelly, Allan DeFazio, John Dap, Paul Guiton, and me.
MIDDLEBURGH — Today is the 18th day of November and right now it is 3:30 p.m. and already getting darkish. The OFs gathered at the Middleburgh Diner in Middleburgh this morning and immediately the chatter started and the din rose.
As many of the OFs age, so do the inner parts of their ears. Now this part of the ear does not flex like it used to; this causes the OFs to speak louder so they can be heard, which causes the collective din to rise, hence the whole place becomes noisy. With this group this phenomenon can’t be helped.
As usual, the OFs drifted back some years to when the joints moved better and we camped along the creek, slept in tents and on the ground. We traipsed through the woods and fields, crawling over logs and fences with a shotgun or rifle at the ready, and hunted, and many of the OFs traveled all over square dancing. Eastern style, western style, and even the style taught in 7th grade.
It was found that some of the OFs even danced with their own kin as callers. One OF’s father-in-law called, and he called with live music. Another OF had two callers in his family — one uncle called with live music from the band Pearly Brand; the other was also the father-in-law of the OF who called from records.
One OF inherited the records of his father-in-law. These records are quite neat; they have one side with a caller, calling the dance and the other side just the music so whatever caller is using the record can use his or her calling style, or make some subtle changes if he or she wants. The other OF had books of calls to practice with.
Square dancing then and probably is, still now, lots of fun. The Hay Shakers was one group, the Silver Bullets was another, and a club from Altamont was brought up but none of the OFs could remember what it was called.
Some OFs traveled far and wide to dance, some as far as Kentucky, Maine, and Ohio, just to dance. There was almost a contest to see who had the coolest matching outfits, the ladies with crinoline under their dresses, and the guys matching ladies wearing western style shirts and pants.
The OFs talked about another activity that seems to be on the wane (only some OFs said it was coming back) and that is bowling. A couple of OFs mentioned they were in more than one group and bowled in more than one league. An OF mentioned that bowling could be done longer than square dancing; square dancing was a lot of exercise, both cardio and aerobic, and could be tough on the joints.
One OF was a pin setter and set pins in the little bowling alley at the end of the Parrott House and under the (at that time) post office in the village of Schoharie. Just like square dancing, some of the OFs traveled all over bowling with their respective teams and felt they were good enough to enter tournaments. Some were.
Twins and tattoos
At our table, bowling led to a brief discussion on twins, because of twins that one OF knew that were pro bowlers and bowled almost the exact same averages.
Then it was noted that most of the OFs at that table had kids that had twins. This scribe found each of the OFs that had family with twins said they were identical. They could not tell them apart until they were older, and one OF said even now he still doesn’t really know which one he is talking to.
Then some of the OFs began talking about tattoos, and what are these young people and young adults thinking about. A few of the OFs had tattoos done when they were in the service, nothing like the tattoos of today.
All of those OFs who had them way back when are sorry now because all the tattoos eventually turned into black blobs. However, as one OF put it, the newer inks and equipment may work much better — only time will tell.
Those OMOTM that hitched ole Dobin to the wagon and trotted on down to the Middleburgh Diner in Middleburgh were: Harold Guest, Wally Guest, Ed Goff, William Lichliter, Robert Schanz, George Washburn, Jim Austin, Randy Barber, Marty Herzog, Pete Whitbeck, Al Schager, Jamehy Darrah, Rev. Jay Francis, Jack Norray, Dick Dexter, Jerry Cross, John Jaz, Herb Bahrmann, Lou Schenck, and me.