Talk of oatmeal prep, old cars, big fish — and a name game

The days are getting longer, or at least are starting earlier. Driving west over Cotton Hill Road to Middleburgh on Tuesday morning was a pure joy. I saw the sunrise, I saw deer and turkeys and flowers and green grass and blue skies and of course, the Helderberg Mountains.

By the way, did you know the Helderberg Mountains are 417 million years old? The Rocky Mountains are only 55 to 80 million years old. Maybe we should change our name to the Old Men Of The Old Mountains!

Anyway, it was a good morning to be alive and I was looking forward to joining my OMOTM friends for breakfast at Mrs. K’s Kitchen.

I knew it was going to be a lively breakfast when two of the OFs changed their usual coffee order from decaf to regular, or was it the other way around? At any rate, Angela, who, like all of our favorite people who know how to take care of us as we travel from place to place, knows our names, what kind of coffee we order and what we usually order.

Take me for example; I always have an English muffin with breakfast. Therefore, she had to question them, “Do you really want your coffee that way?”

This placing of our respective breakfast orders moved smoothly into a discussion of how to cook oatmeal. You have to be careful; if left too long in the boiling water, it will boil over and create a mess that you really don’t clean up with one swipe of a paper towel!

One OF was telling a story of someone he knew who made his oatmeal in a cup and put it in the microwave for about four minutes, whereupon another OF exclaimed, “Wow, four minutes? That cup would be really hot! How did he pick the cup up?”

The OF telling the story reached out with his hand and demonstrated the technique by extending his forefinger and thumb and picked up his coffee cup and said “About like this.”

At this point, the table broke out laughing. It is somewhat humorous to read about that exchange, but I have to ask you visualize a couple of OFs sitting at a long table with a bunch of other OFs with their white hair, or no hair, hearing aids and flannel shirts, sort of listening in to this conversation, and then watching one OF extend his arm across the table to demonstrate how to pick up a coffee cup!

And if that visualization doesn't make you at least smile, then try to visualize Tim Conway explaining this to Harvey Korman on the Carol Burnett Show.

Old cars

We gracefully moved on from that moment to look at some pictures of an older (1950-ish) Hudson car, which prompted memories of some of the names of the  models that Hudson used for its cars.

I didn’t catch or write down the names but I did hear some of the descriptions, such as, “That was the sedan,” or “That was their fast hot one.”

One of the OFs, who evidently has an older car or two, says he would tell those who he would take for a ride in one of his cars, “Bring a pair of good walking shoes and your cellphone.” I guess some of these cars would take you out, but may not bring you back.

Big fish and headless meters

Speaking of cellphone pictures, another OF proudly showed us some pictures of his grandson holding some really big fish he had caught and the OF was heard to say, “Now the student is telling the teacher how it is done!”

One last discussion involved the parking meters in front of Mrs. K’s. Two or three car lengths up the street is a pipe standing there with no meter on top.

That is where this OF likes to park so he can save the 25 cents. Of course another OF asked him if he dropped a quarter down the pipe anyway, quick as a flash the car-parking OF replied “Of course!”

Name game

OK. Time for the Final Paragraph. Going to be different this week. Remember how I sort of messed up a name on the attendance a few weeks ago? And the grief I took for it?

Well, here is your chance, fellow OFs. Can you match the first names with last names of this week’s OFs in attendance?

The attendance list consists of two columns side by side.

The column on the left is called “A.” It contains the first names of those OFs who were here at Mrs. K’s on Tuesday.

The column on the right is called “B.” It contains the last names.

Each row is numbered. Let’s say in column A, row 1 is the name John, and let’s say in column B, row 12, is the name Williams

Row 1: A1 + B12 = John Williams.

If you think that is the right first name (John) that goes with that last name (Williams) then your answer for this row #1 would be A1 + B12. The answer for row 2 might be A2 & B17, and so on. Match the first names from column A with the last names from column B. Don’t write the names, just match column A with column B.

(By the way, John Williams is not allowed to participate. He is too smart and knows everything. Doug Marshall is not allowed either. He is not stupid; he just has the answer key.)

Give me your written answers over the next couple of breakfast meetings, and I will put all the correct answers in a hat or something. The Scribe will draw the winner. There is a very desirable monetary prize for the winner.

Harold    Whipple
Glenn    Cross
Jake    Norray
Dave    Tozer
George    Bahrmann
Ed    Guiton
Jack    Schenck
Wally    Francis
Elwood    Dab
Mary    Donnelly
Dick    Lichliter
Herb    Vanderbilt
Bill    Rack
Marty    Shafer
Ken    Hodgetts
Lou    Gaul
Paul    Goff
Bob    Herzog
Joe    Feurer
Roger    Washburn
Roland    Parks
Henry    Herzog
Jake    Guest
Ted    Traver
Wayne    Lederman
Gerry    Guest
Pastor Jay    Patterson
John    Dexter