Part II: Respite for the caregiver — how to fill ‘me’ time

“Be sure to make time for yourself.” “Use that time to just relax and de-stress.” “Self-care is important to prioritize too.”

These are all phrases that most everyone has been told and, while they are all true, they don’t provide information on what exactly can be done. It is so important to use spare time for self-care; yet when that time comes so does the daunting task of figuring out just what to do in that free time. 

Burnout and decision fatigue are common experiences for many individuals, especially those who help care for loved ones (whether you consider yourself a caregiver or just have someone who depends on you).

These can make brainstorming and deciding what to do in spare time feel impossible. Having a broad list of potential activities can help reduce the stress of trying to de-stress. 

Below is a list of activities that anyone (including caregivers) can do to relax and regain their “me time”

Outdoors:

— Go for a walk (around the neighborhood, through the park and nature reserves, on your favorite trail);

— Have a picnic (on your own or bring a friend);

— Lounge in the sun (remember your SPF!);

— Plant flowers, vegetables, herbs;

— Blow bubbles, draw with chalk, fly a kite, ride a bike; or

— Journal while sitting outside.

Crafting:

— Make a scrapbook or photo album;

— Create your own coloring book (and color it later!);

— Draw or paint one of your favorite pictures; or

— Mold with clay.

Indoors:

— Take a nap;

— Enjoy a long, relaxing shower or bubble bath;

— Start a new book (or reread an old favorite);

— Do a puzzle;

— Play a boardgame with a friend or a loved one;

— Watch a new movie, a funny video, or a show;

— Play an instrument;

— Try a new class (cooking, woodworking, yoga, photography, glassblowing, etc.!);

— Have a solo dance party;

— Meet a friend for coffee;

— Pamper yourself! (get a massage, manicure, new haircut);

— Snuggle a pet (yours or a friend’s); or

— Listen to your favorite music. 

Mindfulness:

— Reflect on your favorite memories (a time you felt at peace, moments you are proud of, a time that you persevered, etc.);

— Write down five of your strengths or things you love about yourself;

— Assess your senses (list one thing that you can see, feel, hear, smell, and taste); or

— Follow along with a mindfulness podcast or video (or make up your own!). 

Other tips and tricks: 

Create a “Me Time Bucket list” with all the activities that you either know you love or look forward to trying. Cross or check them off as you go and add to it when that random thought pops into your head! This can help reduce decision fatigue at a later date. 

Create an emergency de-stress pocketbook. All you need is one sheet of paper, a pair of scissors, and eight of your favorite “in the moment” relaxation methods (breathing techniques, counting, grounding, etc.). Fold the paper by following online tutorials, decorate with your methods, and tuck away in your pocket, purse, wallet, etc. for a quick reminder during a moment of stress.

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Community Caregivers is a not-for-profit agency supported by community donations and grants from the Albany County Department for Aging, the New York State Department of Health and Office for the Aging, and the United States Administration on Aging.

Editor’s note: Megan Osuch, a Community Caregivers volunteer, is a Penn State University graduate with a bachelor of science degree in human development and family studies.