For Donovans Fighting lymphoma like fighting a fire
For Donovans
Fighting lymphoma like fighting a fire
NEW SCOTLAND Mitch and Stephanie Donovan were married in a hospital chapel, and have been living at the hospital ever since.
"Even though our best-laid plans had been wiped out" We got a wedding that was personal and beautiful," Mr. Donovan told The Enterprise.
"We wanted a wedding that was special, not only for us, but for our guests," he said. "We got exactly that."
Mr. Donovan a battalion chief with the Onesquethaw Fire Company who was named the companys firefighter of the year has non-Hodgkins lymphoma.
The couple has been living at St. Peters Hospital in Albany since late March.
Mrs. Donovan remembers that her husband was admitted to the hospital on March 29, just nine days before their wedding.
They were first told he would need to stay a few days, and they thought that was manageable; then they were told a week, then 10 days the duration kept getting longer, she said.
She remembers waking up at around 5 a.m. on her wedding day, and frantically sending e-mails to their guests, informing them that their wedding had been canceled.
They still were married, but, instead of the more than 100 guests they had planned, the ceremony included just 20 of their closest friends and family members. Mr. Donovans Aunt Penny, a retired minister, performed the ceremony, he said.
"It was a purely joyous occasion; it was wonderful," Mr. Donovan recalled. "There’s definitely no sadness involved in it.
"My best man took good care that I didn’t fall over literally," Mr. Donovan said.
"To me, it didn’t matter where it was," Mrs. Donovan said. "It’s not where you do it, it’s the doing it," she said.
"We’ll do another ceremony at some point," Mr. Donovan said.
"In your blood"
"Picking firefighter of the year is one of the hardest things to do," said Chief Fred Spaulding, at the Onesquethaw Fire Company’s annual firemen’s dinner, during which he spoke to Mr. Donovan by phone from his hospital bed. "Sometimes an individual stands out for a heroic effort, sometimes for their years of service, and sometimes for much quieter reasons," he said of the soft-spoken battalion chief.
Mr. Donovan "lives 24/7 for the firehouse," Spaulding told The Enterprise. "He’s just waiting to kick cancer in the butt, so he can get back to the firehouse."
Mr. Donovan, 32, has been a member of the Onesquethaw Fire Company for seven years, he said. He has been a captain and battalion chief for the last two years. Mr. Donovan said he will continue as battalion chief when he recovers.
"Every boy wants to be a fireman at some point" It’s a natural desire, I think," said Mr. Donovan.
"My uncle was a fireman, my granddaddy was a fireman," he said. "When I was a little kid, the best memories were at the firehouse. He said his memories of "hanging out at the firehouse" with his uncle are more vivid than his childhood trip to Disney.
He said of being a fireman, "It’s in your blood, it’s something you have to do."
Thats how it is for him, he said. Its a part of who he is.
"On our first date, we stopped off at the firehouse" to meet the ladies in the auxiliary, Mrs. Donovan remembered with a smile.
"It really is hard to do something right in this day and age," Mr. Donovan said. "Volunteering as a fireman is one of those things."
"I like that he doesn’t do it to get something out of it," said Mrs. Donovan. "He told me once, ‘If I don’t do it, who will"’"
"No matter what reason you’re there, you’re doing a service to your community, and a greater service to your fellow man," Mr. Donovan said. "If you ever saw the look on someone’s face as their house is burning, it doesn’t matter why you’re there, they’re just happy you’re there."
Mr. Donovan "has a lot of great, progressive ideas for the fire company," said his wife. He wants to "help the fire service more efficiently hire, train, and maintain firefighters," Mr. Donovan said. "You can get burned out real fast" as a firefighter, said Mr. Donovan. "I volunteer to do a full-time job."
Mr. Donovan was just days away from undergoing surgery to remove scar tissue from around a tumor, when he spoke to The Enterprise.
"I told the doctor to make tiny cuts," he joked. "I’m going to have some serious scars," he said. "It’s a serious surgery."
He said that he wouldn’t categorize himself as afraid, "Anxious is more the term I’d use. If I’m willing to go into a building that’s on fire, what right do I have to be scared of surgery"" he asked.
Mrs. Donovan told The Enterprise this week that, "everything went wonderfully" with the surgery. "They’ve killed all the cancer," she reported with a note of relief in her voice. Her husband still has to finish his chemotherapy treatments, though, she added.
"There’s always the threat that it will come back," Mr. Donovan said. "With this type of cancer, they can usually put it down and cure it."
Mrs. Donovan generally has a positive outlook, but admits that life is "stressful." Mr. Donovan says admiringly, "She handles it well" She’s the greatest wife in the world."
"It’s not that bad, because he’s making progress," said Mrs. Donovan. "It’s a roller coaster, but it’s getting better," she said.
"How do I get rid of it""
"It all started in October when I went to a fire" I couldn’t keep up with everybody," Mr. Donovan remembered. "For a good kick in the teeth, we got another fire right after it," he said.
At first, he attributed his sluggishness to the heat. "It just got progressively worse," he said. He started getting sick and feeling weak.
His doctor told him he was severely anemic. "I could have dropped dead," he said. He was given a blood transfusion and was shifted from general-practice doctors to surgeons to hematology and oncology physicians.
Mr. Donovan was finally diagnosed with non-Hodgkins lymphoma in January or February, he said.
"The first thing that went through my mind was, cancer is very treatable in today’s age," he said. Then, he said, came the questions: "How did I get this" How do I get rid of it" Why me" Is it something I need to deal with on a patience level" Is it something I need to deal with on a fighting level""
Non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma is treatable with chemotherapy, Mr. Donovan said. "The cure is worse than the disease. It really, truly is," he said.
He has gone through five rounds of chemo and has one more to go, he said.
"I’m waiting for the time when those worries go away," Mr. Donovan told The Enterprise.
Everyone from the fire company has been "unbelievably supportive," said Mr. Donovan. "We’re a big family, no matter how you cut it.
"We’ve been really tight and together as a fire company, which makes us more effective" and keeps us going," Mr. Donovan said. "I’m waiting on that doctor’s note, allowing me to go back to full active duty."
Mrs. Donovan sleeps next to her husband in his hospital room. She works part-time at Price Chopper to earn money to put gas in her car. "I stay here and take care of him that’s more important anyway," she said of quitting her job to be with her husband.
She hopes to start courses again in January to get her degree in veterinary technology, and then, she hopes to go to veterinary school, she said.
"What did I do to deserve her devotion and loyalty"" Mr. Donovan rhetorically asked The Enterprise. "It’s a great privilege to be married to her."